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Hi! My name is Abigail, I want to glorify the Lord in everything I do.
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Chapter Two.
| The next day Starla's mom drove them to the library. "Put them in the Books that look like they need one the most." Starla said as she Gave each of the girls a big handful of Tracts. Hannah put a Tract on how Halloween is Horrible into a Book on how Halloween is good. "The Tract and the book are arguing!" Hannah giggled. Danyl went to the Children's section and put one on a metal shelve. Just when she was about to put her last Tract into a book about Evolution a Loud Booming voice stopped her. "What do you think you are doing?" She Froze. She Slowly turned around to face a Man. He wore a White Shirt and a pair of Dress pants. "Do you see this?" He asked her pointing to his Name tag. "It's my Job to make sure people like you don't Vandalize our books." "I...Wasn't vandalizing any books..." Danyl Replied. "Than what is this?" He took her Tract out of her hand. "Jesus Christ is coming?" He Asked."Nonsense! Keep your Religions to yourself!" And with that being said he Walked off. "Are you alright Danyl?" Starla Asked She had been watching. "Yes.." Danyl Said Slowly. "I want to go home..." "Alright..." Starla Said. She Called her Mom. "Mom Can you come pick us up?" |
Posted: 7:10 PM, Feb. 21, 2008 |
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Oh, my!
This was super, AbbiePie! You had me gripped. "She froze" was a great word picture. I liked the courage of the girls as they put the tracts into the books. And you were specific on why each book got a particular tract. Very, very nicely done!
I do have a spelling/grammar/English hint for you.
It is sometimes hard to read your story when you capitalize words that don't need to be capitalized (like Dress pants). Only proper nouns--NAMES of people, places, or things--need a capital letter (like McDonalds is the name of a restaurant). Or a word at the beginning of a sentence. A good lesson would be to go through your story and decide if the word really needs a capital letter or not! :-)
Please let me know when you have chapter 3 finished. That man is NOT nice to your sweet young characters. |
Posted by SuzyScribbles at 8:13 PM, Feb. 21, 2008 |
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oops!
Well, I just figured out that I wasn't getting any e-mail notifications on the Andi and Cory story blog. I didn't realize a lot of you had posted comments. Silly me! So I'm glad you liked the story. Alas! I don't have any other Andi and Cory stories written right now. But I do have a couple of titles (and nutshell summaries) of ones I want to do:
--Chinese New Year-- When Andi and Cory discover that Chinese children are not allowed to go to school, they take it upon themselves to teach a little Chinese boy how to read--and get in trouble because of it.
--Fool's Gold Fever-- After hearing about a new gold strike in the foothills, Andi and Cory decide to hunt up some gold for themselves. They find it, but is it really gold?
Yeah, like I have time to write these easy-reader stories? I'm supposed to be writing Book 5- The Trouble with Treasure, a REAL Circle C adventure, but all I do is blog! |
Posted by AndiCarter at 6:39 PM, Feb. 22, 2008 |
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Hey! How are you?
-Mandy=) |
Posted by YeLlOwMoNkEy at 8:19 PM, Feb. 22, 2008 |
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| hey i really like that story its cool |
Posted by zacfan at 2:45 PM, Feb. 23, 2008 |
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No, that's not mine. I have a big ol' fat dog that lays around all day and has no energy whatsoever. lol
-Mandy=) |
Posted by YeLlOwMoNkEy at 5:57 PM, Feb. 23, 2008 |
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