(Warning: The link is appropriate for married couples. I'd call it PG-18. )

I am a disgustingly happily married woman.
I say "disgustingly" since most people just get disgusted at how happy we are.
We do have the occassional spat (which, of course, is always his fault) but they are rare.

But I'm always open for improvement.

So when I saw an article called "What Keeps a Man Crazy in Love", I thought I'd check it out.
Better safe than sorry, right?
I mean, he seems really happy.
He says he's really happy.
But I'm always open to learning...

So I start reading...

Play Poker
Hmmmm. Already we have a problem. I'm a better poker player than he is. And I know more types of poker than he does. Ok, skip that and moving on....

Give the Perfect Backrub
Uh-oh. I've tried that and it doesn't work. It would take a jackhammer for him to feel it. I'll have to stick with a back scratch. THAT one I can do.

Tie His Tie for Him
Not looking good here. He doesn't wear a tie. Ever. And if I put one on him, he'd be most unhappy.

Make A Mean Steak
That one's easier. If it's beef, he's happy.

Quote At Least Three Lines from The Godfather
I tried this.
Really.
With my best mafia voice, even.
He looked at me like I was nuts.
I got a better response with,
"This is where we fight. This is where they die..."
in my very best macho, Spartan, voice.
Not a great response mind you, but a better one.

I gave up.

I said; "But I want you to be 'crazy in love' with me."

"I already am", he said.

*swoon*