Wouldn’t it be nice if being a Christian meant, no more struggles?  Seriously… wouldn’t it be great if, upon making the decision to follow Christ, you could rest assured in never having to go through another trial?

We’re not promised that, however, and the reality of being a Christian is some sort of suffering on some level is inevitable.  The difference is, as a Christian we are promised to never go through it alone   …God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.  "So we say with confidence, "The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?"   Hebrews 13:5-6 (New International Version).

I’ve had some struggles of my own lately…  They’ve been frustrating, annoying, and hurtful.  I would really have loved to have just “skipped” over them and moved on to “fun” and “joyful”, but that wasn’t in His plan.  So, instead, I learned not only some things about others, but about myself and God as well (could this have been in the plan all along?).

1. I have a deep desire to be understood… ALL the time.  If someone has taken something I’ve said out of context, or mistaken my intentions… I really have a hard time.  It’s not about being “right”, but thinking that someone has misunderstood my heart (therefore thinking badly of me) that makes me feel horrible.  It’s an especially hard “pill” to swallow when someone doesn’t just like me, but when they’ve misunderstood what the Lord’s part through me was.  One example of this is:  there are many topics I write in my blog, lead by God and my heart to serve Him.  In a recent situation, someone felt I was promoting myself instead.  I was devastated and tried to rectify the situation, however, after several “email conversations”, the person broke off contact and I was left “standing” with the horrible feeling of being misunderstood and disliked.  I felt as if I’d let God down, because instead of ministering to this particular person, I had only upset the person and “discredited” myself.  I wasn’t able to “fix” the situation because communication had ceased and I struggled with knowing what it was the Lord wanted me to learn from that.  I searched hard and prayed long about it.  It was then the Lord told me…
2. …I won’t always be understood.  Looks so good in writing… so easy to read… but so hard for me to accept.  It’s simply a part of being a Christian, especially one in the “public eye” (which, whether you “fellow bloggers” realize it or not… blogging is a VERY public thing).  Whether dealing with another Christian or not, I had to accept, I will NOT always be understood…  My heart may not be looked upon as “gold” (gasp!),  and some may question the very thing dearest to me… my love and service to my Lord, my husband, or my children, and how I go about doing that (another recent situation).  Again, I find myself struggling with this.  It just cuts to core of my heart.  I find myself thinking, “But if they only knew my heart… then they’d understand…”  Then the Lord spoke again, telling me… I won't always be liked (He isn't either), and some may slander me (but there are those who take His name in vain).  Who am I to want others to treat me differently than the Creator of the Universe gets treated?
3. Simply stated… there will be those who simply “don’t get it”.  I could try to explain until I’m blue in the face and pour my heart out until I’ve bled to death, but for whatever reason, their hearts are hard and their ears are shut.  To those I cannot change… my “job” is to “plant seeds” and the Lord will take it from there.  It’s been a very hard thing for me to realize (remember that desire to be understood?) but I know now that the Lord’s plan is great and mighty, and certainly more than I’ll ever understand.  I just need to trust Him to tell me what to do, how to do it… and rest assured in Him to take care of the rest, regardless of how I see the circumstance.
4. Praying for those who hurt you is extremely hard to do.  Honestly, I’d rather just forget about them and let someone else take care of them… (God for example!)  But, I’ve learned that even though it may be hard, Jesus died for those who abused and mocked Him.  He didn’t have to, but He did… I can’t imagine being hurt (physically and emotionally) like that.  Who am I to complain or refuse to pray for those who hurt me?!  (“But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you…” Matt. 5:44)

In all that I’ve learned over the past few months, it’s really as simple as choosing to follow Him.  In making that choice, really surrendering my life to Him (on a daily basis), I have to allow Him to guide me and do what He wants for me, regardless of the struggle I may face.

Then he told them what they could expect for themselves: "Anyone who intends to come with me has to let me lead. You're not in the driver's seat--I am. Don't run from suffering; embrace it. Follow me and I'll show you how. Self-help is no help at all. Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to finding yourself, your true self. What good would it do to get everything you want and lose you, the real you? Luke 9:23-25 (The Message)

Struggling…

It may not be what I want… but Jesus knew He must die for the sins of the world… and He submitted.

I may be uncomfortable… but nothing like the nails that pierced my Savior’s hands… to fulfill the Lord’s plan.

It may be humiliating… but nothing like the jeers from the crowd who mocked the Lamb of God and watched Him suffer and die on the cross…. for my salvation.

Struggling… don’t run from it, embrace it…

embrace it…

embrace Him…

Dear Heavenly Father,
    Please help me to surrender my life to You.  Regardless of what others say or think of me, please give me the strength to do Your will continually, knowing You know my heart... and that's all that matters.
In Jesus' Name,
Amen.