As I sit here reflecting on yesterday, my heart is warmed by the sweet thoughts of my second born son who celebrated his eighth birthday.

He was due on Valentine's Day, and after having had my first child born four days early, being nine days late was really hard for me.  I grew impatient, so when the doctor offered induction as an option, I was "all about that"! 

We decided to use Cytotec, a relatively new drug at the time which I took orally (which they no longer do, and give in smaller doses than what I took).  It's a very uncontrollable drug, but definitely gets the "ball rolling".  Mike had researched all the information he could about it and so we decided to give it a try.

At 8:05 am on February 23rd, 1996, I took the pill and hopped in the shower expecting to go into the hospital some time that afternoon.  Mike also kept with his normal schedule, and had left for work telling me to call him if I needed anything.

While I was in the shower, I began to have stomach pains, but of course, thought that it was just a coincidence... the pill couldn't have worked that fast, I thought.  But the pains kept getting more intense and so I got out of the shower right away.  I called Mike and he was just walking into work (we owned a pawn shop at the time) and I told him the pains had already begun and I was calling my mom to come and watch our son.  While on the phone with my mom, the pain continued to get worse and so I called Mike back and told him we had to go in...

I was changed into a hospital gown and in the delivery room by 8:30am!  It was amazing at what that little pill had set in motion!  What was even more astonishing was the amount of pain I was in.  You can only imagine my disappointment when the nurse told me I hadn't even begun to dialate!  The pain I was experiencing was like that of my first born when I was at a "4"!  I was scared to death and remember looking at Mike with a kind of desperation on my face.

Nubain was suggested to try and ease some of the pain I was experiencing and an IV was put in my hand (which I really hated... you know, give me a million shots, but I really hate IVs).  I really hated that drug... I was falling asleep inbetween contractions (only a minute!) and was groggy.  If it took any "edge" of the pain, I sure didn't notice.  It was a tough time, but I dialated enough for the doctor to give me a shot of Lanicane (as he'd done during my first labor) and the pain was completely gone.  I continued to dialate, but felt no pain so things went unbelievably fast after that.

Mike and I couldn't decide on a girl name, and so each of us had one.  We had an agreement that he would get his choice if the baby were born between 12:00am until 11:59am.  At 12:05pm, I looked over at him inbetween contractions with a smile telling him, "If it's a girl, I get my name..."

It was about 15 minutes after the shot that I called the nurse in and said I needed to push... she said there was no way, but got the doctor.  When the doctor came in, I was ready to go and he gave the okay to start pushing.   Mike was going to deliver him (with the doctor standing close by) but the cord was wrapped and so he got "shoved" out of the way... literally.

I don't remember things as clearly as the first (or other pregnancies since then) I supposed because of the Nubain, but clearly remember the moments following his entry into the world...

At 12:17pm, I looked at this new little life placed on my chest, only to get a sick feeling as I realized I'd heard nothing... no cries.  The lifeless body seemed too heavy to hold as I picked him up to hand to the doctor.  "He's not breathing... he's not breathing!" I began to panic as Mike reached over to turn off the video we'd set up to record this joyous occassion.

I remember Mike's grasp on my hand as he seemed to wrestle with staying next to me, and trying to see what was happening to his son only steps away in the baby warmer as the oxygen mask was put on his fresh skin.

We believed in God then, but didn't have any kind of consistent relationship with Him.  At that moment, I remembered an article I'd read in a magazine at the doctor's office on one of the many prenatal appointments.  It was a story told by a woman who had a baby that came out not breathing.  In those crucial moments, she told of her thoughts of Abraham and Issac and how she knew she needed to give her child to the Lord, regardless of what that meant.  The child was His to begin with.

As the words of the pages came to my mind, I pleaded with the Lord to save my son's life, but gave Him to the Lord to do with what He saw fit.

Tears of immense joy filled my eyes, as well as my husband's, as cries from little lungs came from the warmer.  During my pregancy there were so many people who asked what we wanted, and assumed that we'd "want" a girl since we already had a boy.  After what we went through in those few short moments, I knew I would be more than grateful for a dozen boys, to never experience such horrifying minutes again. 

The doctor also had commented on how our baby seemed to be 2 weeks early.  We had never done an ultra sound at any point, and I felt so bad that I had pushed God's timing.  Now, don't get me wrong... I understand that people induce all the time, and I'm not saying that it's bad... What I'm saying is, I knew that I had been impatient.  This newborn was 6 lbs. 13 oz. (certainly not too large) and waiting longer wouldn't have hurt him any.  He was slow to respond at first (he'd been through a lot in a few short hours!) and didn't cry again until we got him home. 

To do it over, I would be patient and have an ultra sound to be sure the baby was really ready to come out.  I know that the Lord has used my story to help other women remain patient when they're overdue.  I should've have enjoyed the little boy I had at home already, but instead I was so focused on meeting the next one.  Understandably so... it's a pretty exciting thing!  However, you may not know why God does some of the things He does, but you can always rest assured that He is control and His plan is perfect.

I was patient with my next pregnancy as each day passed closer to my due date.  I had convinced myself that I would remain patient, whatever time the Lord chose... and would you believe delived ON my due date?!  But that's a story to be told in April...