Jul. 17, 2008 - Sharing
I don't blog very often, but even so I am always on the lookout for stories I could share.
So yesterday when there were two police cars in front of my house, putting handcuffs on a man, my first thought was to take a picture and share the story here. I just couldn't bring myself to do it. It's kind of f sick that I even thought about it...
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Jul. 17, 2008 - Slow.
That's how the progress in the garden is going. Slow. The places where I've pulled up weeds are now growing new weeds. So I've been thinking through my options:
1. Kristi said to take a lawnmower to it. I would love to do that except that it will still leave all the roots. That's why I've been pulling it up by hand.
2. How about using a big old bottle of Round Up? The problem there is that I'm afraid it will kill the bushes and plants that I want to keep.
3. Persevere. Keep on keepin' on.
Any other ideas are welcome.
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Jun. 25, 2008 - The View From My Cell...
I guess I've been sentenced to hard labor.
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Jun. 21, 2008 - More Flowers, Less Wild
My neighbors have pointed at it and asked me what it is.
Steve has called it a monstrosity.
I call it my wildflower garden.
It is a large patch in the back of our yard. Yes, it looks weedy, but it also has colorful flowers in it. It is supposed to look wild.
But now I am going to tame the wildlflower garden. I have a plan to plant some flowering bushes and perennials and make it into an informal garden. I even have a plan for a path with stepping stones.
But right now I need to work on pulling out all the weeds and grass. I am trying to keep the flax and lupine in there. So everyday I go out there with a bucket and pull weeds til the bucket is full. My goal is one bucket per day because for my life right now, that is realistic. But that plan is starting to give me a Shawshank Redemption kind of feeling. Not that I feel like I'm in prison, but that...well, if you've seen the movie you might know what I'm talking about. This is going to take YEARS.
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Jun. 10, 2008 - Ballet
Emily and Abby were in a ballet this spring.
Here is Emily, who played the Toymaker's Assistant. She is chasing away the preschool mice from the toy shop.
Here is Abby during the curtain call, in the red dress on the left:
Here is Abby's class. She is in the red on the right, behind the front red girl.
And here is Emily in her duet dance. She is in the blue dress.
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Jun. 10, 2008 - Brush With Fame
Saturday evening, the fam went to Lino Lakes DQ for some cones. Afterwards we went to the gas station to fill up the tank.
So Steve was standing outside the van putting in the gas. A limo was parked nearby. A man standing near the limo approached Steve and said, "Mrs. Minnesota is inside the gas station if you want to go in and say hi." Then he peeked through the van window, saw me and said, "Never mind. Your wife is here," and walked away.
So this guy was pacing around the limo, and the limo driver was standing in the parking lot talking on his cell phone. They looked like they thought they were VERY important.
We drove out of the gas station and sat at an intersection with a red light. The limo came out of the gas station, drove around us (ignoring the red light) , and went right through the intersection. A car had to slam on its brakes to keep from hitting the limo. They were putting Mrs. Minnesota's life at risk, right there in Lino Lakes.
We saw them drive south on Lake Drive toward Circle Pines. There are only two things in that direction: A bar called "Trapper's" and a trailer park. Hmm. I wonder where they ended up...
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Jun. 10, 2008 - Sigh.
For supper tonight I tried a new recipe: chicken enchilladas from the Everyday Food website. It took me an hour and a half to make it. It took my family ten minutes to be done with it. And I don't mean that in a good way.
Abby said, "Mom, I REALLY don't like that thing you made. Can I have a peanut butter sandwich?"
Steve said, "Thanks for the supper, Hon. I appreciate your effort."
Emily said, "Thanks for supper, Mom. I'm sorry that I didn't like it."
There's half a pan of it left.
And this is EXACTLY the reason why I don't make meals to bring to people. I've only done it a very few times. But I am just NOT a good cook.
So to any of my friends who have needed a meal: I'm sorry I haven't brought one. I am showing my love for you by NOT cooking for you.
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Jun. 2, 2008 - Banana Cream Pie
This year for history, the girls really enjoyed studying the Great Depression and World War II. As a part of our study, we went to visit my grandma and interview her about those subjects. She had a lot of great stories to tell.
One of the stories I remember the most took place when she and my grandpa were first married and the war was going on. Grandma said there were certain foods that were difficult to get because they were shipped in from other countries. One of those foods was bananas. So it was a huge treat when one day at the store, Grandma was able to buy not one, but two bananas. She took them right home and decided to do something special with them.
She concluded that a banana cream pie would be a great thing to make out of the bananas because it would make a wonderful dessert and last a couple of days. So she carefully made the pie and baked it in the oven in a new, special pie dish.
When the time came to take the pie out of the oven, Grandma pulled it out and it looked perfect. But as she carried it across the kitchen with her oven mitts, the dish slipped and the whole thing shattered on the floor. Grandma and Grandpa were so disappointed.
What I like about this story is how excited they were over the bananas. They had to make many sacrifices during the war. We are able to take so many things for granted today...
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May. 29, 2008 - Among Other Things...
...I'm popping in to say that this pre-menopause thing really stinks. I've been having a hard time functioning these last few days: Foggy brain, sleeplessness, lethargy, hot flashes followed by coldness.
I've been exercising. I've been using/taking:progesterone cream, black cohosh, and flax oil.
And I'm really, really ready for school to be done. It has been a great year, but I am tired...
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May. 22, 2008 - Tragedy and Fear
The tragedy for Steven Curtis Chapman's family has hit me very hard. One of the reasons is because over the years, his music has ministered to me. I can think of many songs that have helped me through difficult times as well as songs that have helped me to rejoice and praise our Lord.
Another reason it hits so hard is that it awakens some huge fears I have been battling over the last couple of years. Every few weeks, corresponding with my cycle, I have a day where I battle thoughts about one of my family members suddenly dying. It's always about either Steve or the girls, and my mind wanders all day long thinking about the details about what that would be like. I have to constantly remind myself of scripture: whatever is true, right, noble, pure, lovely, excellent...think upon THESE things.
I've seen Dr. Phil (yeah, I know...) ask a good question to people who repeat behaviors that they don't want to do: What is the payoff? What are you getting out of this? Because you wouldn't be doing it if you didn't get something out of it.
And so just now, as I was in the basement doing my cardio workout, I realized what my payoff is: Deep down, I believe that if I think through my worst fears ahead of time, maybe that will somehow prepare me in case it actually happens. Maybe it won't be so painful. Maybe I won't be blindsided. Realizing this, I cried through my cardio.
Being blindsided by tragedy is exactly what I fear. I can look back at my life, as I'm sure you can too, and pick out the days when something happened. Where one day I was one person, and the next day I was never the same again. Like when my grandpa died. Or when I had an emergency c-section and believed that my baby and I were both going to die. Or when I found out my brother's marriage had fallen apart.
So, as I cried through my cardio, I confessed this fear to my Heavenly Father. He is never blindsided. He is never surprised. We will be. But God is God and I am not. And my Redeemer is faithful and true.
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May. 22, 2008 - So Sad...
My heart is so heavy today for Steven Curtis Chapman and his family. I'll be praying for them.
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May. 19, 2008 - Cooking
Tomorrow night on American Idol, the contestants are singing three songs. One of them will be a song they sang earlier in the season.
If David Cook sings "Billie Jean," I will vote for him one hundred times.
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May. 19, 2008 - No...
...I'm not back into the exercise routine. I had one good week and then got sidetracked again. Now that I'm over my colds/viruses/stomach problems I am planning on starting again today after my haircut.
Anyone else? How's the routine going?
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May. 19, 2008 - Late Bloomer
One of my favorite flowers finally started blooming - Bleeding Heart.
What are some of your favorites?
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May. 19, 2008 - Reading
When each of her granddaughters turn twelve, my mom loans them her copy of "Little Women." She gives them a letter telling about the Christmas Day that she got the book as a gift, and how it is one of her favorites. After reading it, the granddaughter signs and dates the inside cover.
Emily spent the last two days on the patio swing reading the book. It's so much fun to see my daughters loving the same books I do.
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May. 19, 2008 - 40 Going on 14
Yesterday at church I waited in the lobby while Emily was in the restroom. When she came out, she started walking right past me. Then she stopped and laughed. She said she didn't know it was me. She thought I was a teenager.
Then later in the day, I thought of the reason she could have easliy mistaken me for a teenager: My entire forehead has been covered in pimples for the last month. I guess premenopause is very similar to preadolescence.
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May. 5, 2008 - Why?
Why did I quit exercising back in December? It was going very well.
It is SO HARD to get back into it.
Note to self: Don't quit the exercise routine.
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Apr. 15, 2008 - Airhead
I am an airhead. And I am at my worst when I am nervous. My heart beats fast, I start sweating, and I don't understand anything that is going on around me. I should never leave the house.
So today I had an eye exam. I worked hard at breathing slowly and listening carefully. I made it through the exam with just a couple of "Huh?" and "What's going on?" moments.
After the exam I walked to the register with the eye doc. The cashier told me how much I owed for the exam and then walked away. The eye doc held out her hand to me, so I shook it. She laughed and said she was reaching for my HSA credit card. Well, at least I bring laughter and joy to people's lives.
I can't wait for my dentist appointment tomorrow and my mammogram next month.
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Apr. 15, 2008 - You too!
I've been looking for a long time for this video of Brain Regan doing his "You too!" bit.
I don't know how to put a video on my blog, but here is a YouTube link (and check out some of his other videos):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aAZXQItJs0M
Enjoy the video! You too!
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Apr. 13, 2008 - Anxiety: A Choice
When I started homeschooling, I knew that God had completely led our family in that direction, without a doubt. Along the way, He has confirmed it to me. Just last week it was confirmed again that we are on a path that is the best for for our kids and our family.
But recently I have overheard two conversations where people were making fun of homeschoolers. The jokes were the same types of things that Steve and I have laughed over, but for some reason I felt bad when I heard some non-homeschoolers make the jokes.
Today I felt a ton of anxiety over homeschooling. I have to admit that I went in the bathroom and cried, praying to God about my fear that I am ruining our children.
At that moment God brought to mind a conversation I recently had with a group at church. We were talking about fear and having trouble trusting God. A dude named Jeremy said, "God must get so frustrated with us. He provides for us over and over and over again, and we are still scared and worried."
So I am making the CHOICE to fight the anxiety. This is not easy. In fact, this week I have two medical appointments and they make me very, very anxious. But God clearly tells us "Do not be anxious about anything..." We all know the passage. How much clearer can He get?
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