NO RETURN

NO RETURN

Jan. 1, 2020 - Comments

This is my writing space...

DON'T leave me comments or messages on here...

If you feel so inclined...
check out the few of these...
that have actually made it...
all the way to musical form...
on myspace!

Here:
http://www.myspace.com/cannotreturn

And we can be myspace friends!!

Sep. 2, 2008 - Get out?

I wish she would either leave my skull, or enter my room...
but this pile of rusted bones has me completely shredded...

I smell like a bowl of cabbage...
And I hate what happens underneath my shirt...
It burns, and turn the colours back into shadows...
She eats a piece of bread while my eyes turn blue...

But my eyes cannot become so vain...
The sting her skin with the fear the burns through them...

And she falls to her knees as the tears drain out...

I broke the faucet and ate the super-glue, and now I've gone and turned against you...

Without super-glue...
I can't repair the foot...
That I tore from your leg...
Just cause I wanted to see you...

I'll buy you a yacht...

It will sail faster than all the others, but when I set foot upon it...
It's powers of buoyancy will falter, I it will become as a stone in the sky...

I can't feel the thoughts in my head anymore...

Jun. 18, 2008 - I HATE ME!!!

...

Jun. 12, 2008 - White & Red

Blech...
You've eaten you way out of the wormhole...
Now what will you do with the leftover salad?

It's not enough to walk away...
sometimes you just have to take a life...
when those thoughts start to file into your head...

it's time to break the walls of thier skin...
it's time to make a move, and exact the kill!

We cannot follow thier story, but if the chain is broken...
though my heart may cry, it will not cut down the one...
in the corners I hide from speech...
I stand and watch as they call you away...

No matter how hard I try... my voice always fails...

I am not the assassin I wish to be...
able to make a precise cut, right into your heart...
is a dream I shan't ever reach...

A failure I am, and it's not likely to change...
but my blade is sharp...
so, my hope is to one day pull out of fear...
open the doors to clarity...
and plunge this steel right into your heart!

for now I will lie in wait, and listen for the footsteps of last nights escape...

Jun. 10, 2008 - I Wonder...?

If I had a shadow inside me...
would we become friends?

Or would it devour me...
like a parasite from within?

Would we fuse our strengths together...
and become a new creature...
capable of saving mankind...
from the evil shadows it has created?

I hope that my shadow would have wings!

(....I read the first book Ral Grad today....)
(.....I would not recomend it based on.....)
(....sexual content, but I couldn't seem....)
(to put it down.. The concept of shadows)
(.....being parasitic beasts that live off.....)
(......humans was just too entrancing!.....)
(and the main character looked so cool!)

Jun. 8, 2008 - Hrmph...

I had so much to say last night...
but those words have all run away...

They got distracted by the colour in your eyes...
and were swallowed up, by angry wolves...

I'm sick of thinking about you!
and having no reason to...

You don't even talk to me...
I'm not good enough for you...
but no matter what I do...
you're inside my head...

I say every time:
"Take away these dumb lines!"
on the pages inside my mind...

In there...
I can see things happening the way I want them too...
but I know it can never come true...
so in my dreams, I imagine that you...
are appalled by the thought of me...
and you would tell me:
"You fool! how could you even think about me today!? I hate you now go away!!"

But then...

what is it, I wonder, that you would really say?

Jun. 1, 2008 - Ninjutsu

I am on the tree tops...
Looking down at you below...
When you look up you don't see me cause.
I'm inside the wind...

I call out to reach you...
You don't hear my voice at all...
The only sound to reach your ears is...
The wind that brings the clouds...

My heart longs, to know you...
It breaks upon your stone eyes...
I feel your hand in mine...
How did this get so divine?

May. 27, 2008 - Hayaku!

Can the walls hold me in?
Will they stop the door from opening?
Where is my escape?

Does it evade my eyes?

If I begin to walk, toward the exit in the floor...
The ceiling won't be able to say a word, in my defence...
But the screams of melting candleabras...
Will pierce these ears no more...

I shan't be late!

May. 26, 2008 - Why can't I see them running!?

At least I still have my hat!

I may not know who freedom has taken...
But the way you feel when the dreams end...

They took you!
Yet I feel stolen, by the paws of crustaceans...
To prowl for air, among the clouds...

Can't you leave me to die already?

I'm tired and full of holes...
I can stand upon the ceiling...
but I can't feel my feet!

If you wish, break apart my skin! peal open my eyes...
Create a new beast inside my head...
Though I might steal what little love is left inside of you!

I hate you... and your kind!
You say not now...
But your mind is full of dreams...
Not with me, but in the sea!
You act alone, I can't stay away...
Afraid...
Consumed...
Subdued...
Conclude!

The end is not so kind...
It evades even the swiftest arrows...
It tears through walls of solid stone!
It breaks the line of an eagles sight...
It leaves me lost on the desert floor!

GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!!
but don't leave me alone...
I'm afraid of the light...
and I'll burn in the sun!

I'm sorry these words take away from the life...
that breathes through your lungs, and out onto the ground...
I'm a waste of all time...
taking love from your eyes...
Kill me!

And then...
I will smile...

One final time.

May. 23, 2008 - Last months rent...(Yay! something I drafted and forgot about!)

If I fall in love with her, I'll still be dreaming of you...
When I fall in love with her, I'll still wish it was you...
As I fall in love with her, I'll realize, it's only you I see...

It's your eyes...

I can't look at them...
They make me want you more...

Hide your eyes from me, so I won't fall in love with you...
but the only thing I want to do, is be alone with you...
In the streets, I'll wander...
Wishing it was you by me...

I wish I could just collapse and be no more...
For then I would no longer be wishing I was with you...

I want to make you smile...
I want to make you laugh...
I want to make you music...
I want to make you feel alive...
I want to make you love me...
I want to make you break my heart...
I want nothing!

I hate how I feel...
and how it might make you feel...

I don't want to show you that I think about you constantly...
I want you to be better than me...

Apr. 20, 2008 - Wish for love?

I wish I would fall in love with you...
but you wouldn't agree, you'd deny me...
though even you feel it too...
I wish you could tell me no, but I haven't asked you, so...
you'll leave me alone...

and when I speak to you, you'll never even know...
that I'm hiding my love, though it burn a hole in my chest...
I'll keep it from you, so you won't be tied down...
so you can be free...

I want to fall in love with you but your heart deserves more than an exoskeleton...
I'm hollow and warped, like a log in the woods and I'd only shatter your stained glass tears...
I wish I could fall in love with you, your eyes so full of energy just waiting to burst out in song...

the laughter I once heard still singing me to sleep...
the words you didn't say, when I failed you the most...
the silence I heard from your lungs in the night...
the smile you gave when I said something dumb...
the way you walked up the hill, just so I'd not feel alone...

I wish I was in love with you...

Mar. 28, 2008 - Alaskan Salmon in Purple...

Sail over the deepest blue sea, and feel the waves crashing down on your feet...
Your sandals would erode away if you stay there... but only in your dreams...

Climb that ladder outside the ships deck, see what's never seen...
Countless grains upon the seashore, more than you could read...

Follow ropes to brand new hideouts, seagulls cannot reach...
Calling winds and cracking seashells, take these hidden things..

Wait for freedom, will take you away...
Light up this life, not fallen astray...

Mar. 28, 2008 - Melodies don't travel through lightwaves...

Why?

Mar. 26, 2008 - Sweep the dust...

I feel the wind blow, it's rushing at my back...
Should I turn and face it, No!
There are projectiles fighting violently to gain freedom from tornados sprouting up like daisies in a field so full of grass to the brim of this tall martini glass... Drink it in while the string quartet plays soft under the lights hanging down the train tracks that climb the mountainside much higher than this tall tower... From here I can see everything and your car is pulling through a tiny tunnel of sound waves on the ocean floor... They swim past coral reefs and down back ally ways seeking silence in the memories of you... In the air that smells so clean sweep the dust under the carpet threading needles to supply the blood streams flow... Over a cliffside making waterfalls cascade onto the dishes soaking up small rays of sun light up the flames and barbecue some beef it's what's for dinner on the table's set... up a tent inside a forest fire flies are in the garden giving off a glow without a sound...

Mar. 25, 2008 - Voice Machine?

You let that girl take your heart and let it fall away from where it was, now I never hear from you...
You said it was nothing much but I heard, that when she broke, you had a headache for a week...
And now I want to know what I've done to make you ignore me, so what else can I say?

I'd write you a song, but the last I heard from you...
Was only the message, on your voice machine...

I'd write you a song, but you don't want to hear...
rewinding memories of days we won't ever see...

Then you played joke with a friend, but you couldn't tell me when... until you'd had a couple weeks...
I wanted so bad to ask you, why you did not say to me, how you felt for the one who let you down...
But there's no answer on the line when I call no voice to speak to me, how can I let you go?

I'd write you a song, but the last I heard from you...
Was only the message, on your voice machine...

I'd write you a song, but you don't want to hear...
rewinding memories of days we won't ever see...

Mar. 24, 2008 - Get lost in Tokyo

Let's get lost in Tokyo and find our way to nowhere...
Leading us to where traffic lights don't ever even end...
Sidewalks filled with business men, talking on their cell phones...
Street signs that we can't even read will take us far from here...
Let's get lost in Tokyo, like I said to you that day we met in Frisco...
Walking in a shopping mall that's so crowded I can hardly stand...
So we drive off to the park with the sun high over Texas...
Driving down the wrong boulevard, should've taken, that right off Ohio...
Let's get lost in Tokyo who needs a map when you feel so free...

We could rent a car and drive the shutto til it ends...
No need to remember where we've come from or where we've been...
The sun goes down and lights turn on and all I need to know...
Is, you are here beside me and you'll stay here where I go...

Let's get lost in Tokyo and visit shops on random corners
Hanging lanterns from the wires in the ceiling of this tiny store
Let's get lost in Tokyo eating sushi on a cold park bench
Boys play ball inside a fence, Strike three now it's time to go home
Let's get lost in Tokyo I forgot to count the hours
Now my flight is coming in and I'm late to the airport running
Let's get lost in Tokyo I hope that we can get there soon...

Mar. 23, 2008 - ...was it only a waste of time?

It was like a strange look into the past...
It was like a portal had opened up to let her out of history...
The blues in the sky had blended together becoming a massive blur...
And I have grown tired...

I can't imagine what she could see in it...

If only in younger days, we could have tried...
Time has torn my brain away...
Inside my memory, sights dance alone over oceans...
I knew what was coming when my return flight would land...

And time had removed just one from me...
I could not feel what might have been...
And now I'm scared for what I may have done...
I can't seem to let that last moment escape...

By the wall so gray, I remember many faces...
And false rain from the walls...
We fought for control, in a parking lot...

I could not see, what it could mean...
And under cement we talked of friends and family...
Take out the trash, leftovers, I couldn't even eat...

I feel so old when I think back in time...
But I'm only twenty-one...
I've got so far to go...

Mar. 23, 2008 - With Your Love

Though I fight to be stronger in my own way...
You still wait, while my failings don't fade...
I scream out Your name, from my soul...
And now...

Your love is overwhelming me...
With peace that bring me to my knees...
That you would come to set me free...
With Your love...

Broken and shattered by the sins I have made...
Fallen, unholy, not worthy of Your name...
I call out to you, from in my darkest place...
Yet somehow..

Your love is overwhelming me...
With peace that bring me to my knees...
That you would come to set me free...
With Your love...

Mar. 20, 2008 - Root of the problem!

Imagine this...

You decide one day to go for a long distance bicycle ride...
So, you start early in the morning, and head off through the country side...

Along on your travels, you have taken with you...
A pair of sunglasses,
A cellular phone,
A helmet(safety first eh?)
and,
A camel bag(water)

As you begin down the street you wonder, "Should I have some food with me?"
But since you have already left you choose against it...

You ride past a school, and then a gas station...
Taking to the right, you reach an intersection from which you head north...
After nearly forty-five minutes the road curves to the west...
You continue on this westward winding route for another three hours...
At this point you are in the middle of nowhere...
on some nameless road and...
wishing very much that you had brought along a meal...

As the roadway takes a turn toward the south, you notice a tree at the top of the next hill...
Approaching it you see sign that it is an apple tree...
Upon reaching the place where it stands, you step down off you bicycle and remove your helmet...

Then you look up into the tree, searching hard for the fruit that it has so diligently been preparing...
Not a trace...
No wait what's that at the very top?

One nicely large bright red apple!
But it is all the way at the top of the tree...

How will you get it?

It appears to be just ripened, so it's not likely to fall for another week or so...
And obviously you can't wait that long...
You've been riding for almost five hours...
And you didn't even eat a meal before leaving...

You are starving now!

The only way to get that apple is to climb out on the limb and pick it off...
And to do that you must stat at the base of the tree and work your way up...

Climbing from branch to branch...
Making certain that each one is steady and supportive...
If you mistrust any you could become badly injured...
Yet you must climb to obtain the fruit you wish to have.

Blah blah blah, story goes on...
you ride south and then back east...
till the gas station is again in view...
and then past the school and home again.

Mar. 13, 2008 - I guess not...?

It just struck the inside of my mind...

That you really don't care of my antics...

Suddenly...

I'm not trying to convince myself...
That you aren't looking for me...

I feel so soft, and alone...
It's almost wonderful...

I'm not letting you down...
If you're not expecting me to hold you up...
Maybe someday you'll want my life...
Maybe someday I'll be in yours...

If that's the case, I'll live 'til then...

<- Last Page :: Next Page ->

About Me

Don't.. face... me..... you.... will.... only... earn... pain...

Recent Posts

� Comments
� Get out?
� I HATE ME!!!
� White & Red
� I Wonder...?

Links

� Home
� View my profile
� Archives
� Email Me