Praise God!

Another lady who attended our Experiencing God In Pregnancy talk gave birth early this month and she had an awesome birth!

No pain!

I am just beaming with joy for her and awed by the awesome-ness of our God. Check out her birth story on her blog at Precious Memories.

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Articles for Christian SAHMs can be found at :

www.BuildingUpMoms.com

A friend just birthed and had a wonderful time. It was painfree though tiring labour and birth experience.

I am just so pleased for her. Since 2004, dh and I have been sharing our birth experiences at Wesley Methodist Church under the title "Experiencing God In Pregnancy". She was so keen to make this work that she attended TWO of the talks! One before she was pregnant and the 2nd when she was pregnant.

She'd called me on Friday night when she had her show but no contractions. I told her not to go into the hospital just yet. To complicate matters, her doctor was away! He would not be returning till Monday. And she had originally booked her hospital bed at Mount Alvernia Hospital (Mt A) . But the stand-by/stand in (?!) dr at Mt A was also away! Now that caused some stress  But the stand-in dr at Thomson Medical Centre (TMC) was available.

I told her that if it were me, I'd go with the doctor than the hospital.  She did end up at TMC last night and had the baby this morning.

In her words - it was not painful but it was uncomfortable and tiring! Her baby is also nursing like a champ. What a way to enter motherhood!

I'll see if she is up to writing our her testimony anytime soon. If so, I'll put a link to her blog, with her permission of course! These kinds of stories must be shared! All we hear are the 24hr long labours and excruciating pain, etc....

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Articles for Christian SAHMs can be found at :

www.BuildingUpMoms.com

Some time ago, I had someone tell me that her doctor told her to eat SUGAR to put on weight for her pregnancy!!!

Then yesterday, while giving the Experiencing God In Your Pregnancy talk, a lady shared that her doctor told her that Asians can't birth naturally!!! That natural childbirth is only for Caucasians!

Amazing that these doctors are allowed to practice medicine!!!

If you are expecting or are planning to start a family, you may be interested to attend our talk at Wesley Methodist Church.

Titled, Experiencing God In Pregnancy, my dh and I will share a Christian perspective on pregnancy and childbirth.

Date : 29th March 2008 (Saturday)

Time : 2:15pm - 6:00pm

Venue : Level 3 Hall, Wesley Methodist Church

Cost : $2.00 per participant
(light refreshment will be provided)

We will cover the following topics :

• knowing your position in Christ,
• our Birth Stories,
• the Chrisitian's antenatal response,
• preparing to be parents and
• Q & A

If you are interested in attending, please contact Evangeline Leong at 68378610. Do pass this on to your friends who may be interested. But please note that this is not a medical talk.

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Articles for the Christian SAHM can be found at :

www.BuildingUpMoms.com

Everytime we are blessed with a pregnancy, I learn many things. Some pleasant, some not. Some practical, others spiritual. But all ultimately to bring me to a closer relationship to God.

These are what I learnt this time round :

1. God is in control. No matter how much we fight it, it is God who's in control. He was the one who opens the womb and He is the one who calls forth the baby to be born. His timing is perfect - always!

2. Our God wants us to have a relationship with Him. He therefore does not work according to a method. He is not the proverbial santa clause in the sky!

3. Each birth is different. No matter how many times one births a baby, it is always a different experience. The only certain thing is that God is there for you if you would let Him. Remember, The Lord is my Helper. I will not fear. Hebrews 13:5

4. No matter how prepared you are, you are never prepared enough!

5. Our bodies are made to birth babies. It is God's perfect design if we would allow God to be God. Many times, we defer to Man's wisdom and Man's ways and short change ourselves from experiencing God's Hand on our lives. This birth is proof that we do not need a doctor to birth a baby!

I am not doctor bashing. I have a lovely doctor and I have learnt alot from him and even from my other doctors. But the point is - in the end, who do we put our trust in? God or Man?

6. We need to be responsible for the health of our bodies - taking care of it by eating and drinking properly. This includes post partum as well. Since He is in control, when we have our next baby is in His Hands. But we have a responsibility to look after our bodies properly - all the time. If we eat junk food and stay unhealthily overweight and say that it is the close gap between the babies that is causing our health problems, we are in effect, blaming God for the state of our bodies.

7. Red Raspberry Leave (RRL) Tea is God's gift to women! It tones and strengthens the uterus. This in turn facilitates a more efficient labour and less post partum bleeding.

A personal story - I drank a lot of RRL mixed with Nettle leaves with pregnancy #4. My afterbirth contractions were very mild and bleeding was also minimal. With pregnancy #5, I decided that I didn't need to drink that much RRL tea . I bled much more and the afterbirth contractions were very uncomfortable.

For pregnancy #6, I decided not to stinge and drank RRL and Nettle tea consistently from the 3rd trimester onwards. I continued to drink it after birth. The bleeding post partum was noticeably less than after #4! This goes against common medical belief that the more babies you have, the more you bleed post partum and the more painful the afterbirth contractions.

However, on the day I returned home fom the hospital. I didn't have time to boil and drink the tea throughout the day. That day, bleeding and afterbirth contractions increased! Say OUCH! When I went back to drinking it the whole day the next day, the bleeding and contractions decreased again.

Moral of the story? Drink your RRL tea!!!

Amount to drink - The rule of thumb is 1 cup per day in the 1st trimester, 2 cups per day in the 2nd trimester and 3 cups per day in the 3rd trimester. Usually, it is 1 tsp of leaves to 1 cup of tea. BUT for those who had miscarriages before, it is highly recommended that you do NOT drink it till the last trimester.

For me, as this was my 6th birth, I increased my dosage a lot more. I poured 1 litre of boiling water onto 1/2 cup of leaves and drank it diluted with cold water throughout the day.

Don't just take my word for it. Do your own research! I am not a herbalist. But I know it has helped me.

8. It is ALL God and none of me. I can do this only because of what Jesus did for me (and you!) at the cross of Calvary. He took the sins of the world upon Himself that we may live in victory and not under the curse. I can do this not because it is my 6th birth. I can do this only because He is my Saviour.

Ask me to do it on my own and I will say "no". I am a chicken when it comes to pain. (The jab after birth to help the uterus contract was so painful!!! ) But I stand as a testimony to the power of the cross that there was NO pain - save the pain on my tailbone from birthing in that awkward position!

Truly that can only happen because it is ALL of God and none of me.

May you be blessed as I have been truly blessed!

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Other Birth Stories are found here.

Visit www.BuildingUpMoms.com for encouragement for the Christian SAHM.

Yes, she's here finally! But woah! What a way to enter the world! This birth story is given as a testimony to the faithfulness & awesome-ness of God the Father, through Jesus His Son. All glory to Him!

Baby #6 joined the family on 7th June 2007 (6 days past EDD), weighs 3.34kg and is 50cm long.

4pm - If you had been reading Diary of Labour #6, you'd have known the number of false alarms I've had. So when contractions started at 4pm, Thursday afternoon (7th Jun), I just ignored it. Even though they were 10min apart. But the intensity was rather strong so I thought - well this could be it! So I got dinner ready and started preparing to bake Banana Bread for the next day's breakfast.

6pm - As I was eating dinner, the contractions were strong enough to cause me to perspire. Hmm...this probably is IT! So I sms-ed my dad & told him to eat his dinner & prepare to come over. I finished up dinner & went upstairs to pack all the last minute stuff - toothbrushes, comb...& showered. The contractions got closer & stronger. I got out of the shower & sms-ed my dad to start driving over.

About 7pm - I told dh that we should start bathing the younger children & put them to bed earlier. I lay down at the couch while he bathed them. The contractions continued at 10min apart but lasted longer & were definitely stronger.

8pm - My parents sms-ed me that they will wait downstairs til I am ready to leave. They can't come upstairs to wait or the children will get too hyped up to go to bed.

8:20pm - Got the children upstairs to pray & ready for bed. Contractions now 7min apart.

9pm : Started to sms friends to start praying for me!

9:30pm - asked my parents to come up & wait. Dh opened up the sofa bed in case it is a long wait ahead - ha! Contractions now 5min apart, lasting 1.5min. Prayed for a sign to leave.

10pm - Laid on sofa bed. I'd always preferred to labour lying down sideways and usually fall asleep between the contractions.

Contractions now lasting almost 2min long but still 5min apart. Should I leave or not? Contractions then moved to 3min apart. Just as I decided to tell dh to leave, the contractions went back to 5min apart. Then I felt the urge to push. Hmm....leave now? Then nothing. So I continued to wait. Another urge to push. Time to go, I told dh. I made my way to the toilet and discovered that a huge amount of mucous plug had been discharged! Oops! I may have waited a bit too long!

10:25pm Made way very slowly to the lift and car. Told dh that he needed to push back the middle row seats for me. The moment I climbed in, I felt the need to PUSH! I got onto all fours immediately (with 1 leg on the floor to stabilise myself).

Throughout the car ride, I felt the urge to push several times and then suddenly, pop! "My bag has burst! Pass me the towel!" Thankfully the towel was packed right on top. Dh could continue to drive with one hand and tossed the towel to me with the other. Lol! 

At that moment, I thought that the baby was about to be birthed there and then. Dh kept telling me that we were about to reach the hospital. But what I really wanted was for dh to stop the car somewhere for me to birth the baby!

When we reached Mt Alvernia, I thought dh rushed out to get someone to help me out. But he told me later that he just grabbed the nearest wheelchair he saw and with that, a male nurse came with him. But .... The baby is pushing out of me and they want me to sit on the wheelchair? How?!

The silly male nurse then told dh to go & park the car - like that is the most important thing to do at that point in time?! But he suddenly changed his mind and told dh "You better come with me!"

In between contractions, I managed to sit on the chair for them to wheel me into the lobby area. But because the urge to push was so strong, I pushed myself off the chair to try to labour on firm ground vs a shaky wheelchair.

But the same male nurse actually hauled me up back onto the wheelchair! So I shouted "The baby is coming out!" But of course no one believed me. He told me, "No, no, cannot!" Excuse me?! And still tried to continue to wheel me into the delivery suite. One of the more alert nurses must have decided that I was telling the truth coz she quickly directed the wheelchair into the nearest examination room of the 24hr clinic where I could see the baby's head crowning as we passed the doorway.

And with everyone standing around and not knowing what to do, the baby's head emerged. This comes the surreal part. No one knew what to do. Everyone stood standing and staring! I told dh, "Go and hold the baby's head!" But before he could react, I saw the 24hr clinic dr stepping forward and felt the the baby's shoulders pushing through at the same time. The dr caught the baby and I heard her cry loudly! Stunned silence.

The dr continued to hold on to the crying baby. I had to say three times, "Give me the baby!" before he reacted. Then like in a slow-motion movie, everyone reacted. All talking at the same time.  

And all they know what to do then was to keep saying "Cut the cord, cut the cord!" Dh had the presence of mind to remind them to wait for the cord to stop pulsing first! Meanwhile, baby was crying on & off while I held on to her. I tried to nurse her but she was too busy crying!

I asked dh to take pictures to document this interesting birth but realised that the camera & video were all still in the car. So he had to run out to get it. Then he got one of the nurses to take photos of him cutting the umbilical cord.

After birthing in that awkward position (sitting on my tailbone!) I tried to move into a more comfortable position. But guess what? They wouldn't let me! They insisted that I had to sit that way while they wheeled me to the Delivery Suite to birth the placenta and clean up!

I was then wheeled to the Delivery Suite. I looked back & saw the mess I left behind.  We then had to wait for more than an hour for the stand-in dr to check me! My own dr was on holiday in Bali! Meanwhile baby was nursing happily and helping my uterus to contract. When the dr finally came, he helped to birth the placenta and checked my perinium. He then pronounced that I did not have any tears!!! There would be no need for any stitches! That was miraculous to me considering the awkward position I had birthed in & the speed with which baby was birthed! Praise God!

Reflections : I stand in awe of the obvious hand of God on this whole birth process.

On Wednesday, 6th June, dh & I got together to pray that :

1. Baby will be born by 7th June (Thursday)
2. Labour will be quick
3. No tearing, no episiotomy
4. Little disruption to household routine 

Many people had asked if they should pray for baby to come only when my dr is in town & I have always told them that it didn't matter. I was given Hebrews 13:5 and I rested in the assurance that The Lord is my Helper. I will not fear.

And truly - The Lord helped to birth this baby!

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Other Birth Stories are found here.

Visit www.BuildingUpMoms.com for encouragement for the Christian SAHM.

Ok - I know I said I am at peace with whenever the Lord decides to bring forth this baby. And I am.

But hey! I do wish people will stop asking me if the baby is out!!!

Look - I will sms/email/blog/run an ad?! when the baby is out, ok?

I know, I know - you care! But constantly asking me about it is not helping to get the baby out, kwim?

And yes, it is Day 6 past EDD now and my lovely pro-natural dr has gone for his week long holiday - in Bali! I hear . It is ok. As dh said - we trust in God, not man. And as the Lord Himself told me in Hebrews 13:5 - 6

I will never leave you nor forsake you.
So (I) may boldly say
"The Lord is my Helper; I will not fear.
What can man do to me?"

I promise I will let you know - details & all - when the baby comes.

1st June 2007 (Friday) - Week 40
THE day!!! But, no sign of baby's arrival.  Well, it is said that only 3% of women have their babies on their Edd. I guess I do not belong to the 3%! And never have been!

2nd June 2007 (Saturday)
We have officially gone past my EDD - yet again! Was having an interesting exhange with a friend that for both of us, our 4th, 5th & 6th babies have gone past their due dates! But we both had our 1st 3 earlier than the EDD.

She made a point that I have not paid any attention to before - our post date babies are bigger, more matured and easier to handle compared to our "early" babies. She called the early ones "undercooked"! Lol!

Anyhow, again, I have come to the point of acceptance that baby will come when she's ready. And only God knows when that is!

3rd - 5th June 2007 (Sun - Tues)
Still waiting............

Surprisingly calm now. It is as tho I had to pass my EDD to reach this state of calmness & peace!  But it is not a state of resignation, mind you!

The only thing that bugged me a little was the fact that dh deliberately cut back on speaking engagements for the month of June so we are in effect "wasting" our June away as baby delays her arrival day-by-day. And his July is jam-packed!

And - dh has an overnight retreat coming up on 7th - 8th July! Meaning, the later she comes, the less time I have to adjust to flying solo with 6 children at night!

But the Lord in His compassion & grace led me to Hebrews 13:5 - 6.

For He Himself has said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you."
So we may boldly say :
"The Lord is my helper; I will not fear. What can man do to me?"

Wow! The Lord was telling me not to worry when baby is arriving. That even though I may have no physicaly help, I have His help. Then His peace returned.

6th June 2007 (Wednesday)
Went for another check up. Amniotic fluid is looking very good. Very slight calcification at the edges at the placenta which is very normal for this stage of the pregnancy - 40 weeks & 5 days.

Last night I had 2 hrs of regular contractions again. They were strong enough to keep me awake from 2:30am to 5am! I really thought "Great! This is it!" But I was wrong! Now I am totally exhausted from being up half the night.

If this girl holds out till next week, she may just birth at 42 weeks! Now will she or will she not break the record?  The other question I have is - just how big will she get?! My biggest by far has been 3.5kg and she came 5 days post date.....

Let me just preface to say that this is the first time I am doing this!

17th May 2007 (Thursday)
We have now proceeded to weekly check ups. At the last visit, the dr told me that the little one was in a very good position - head down & facing inwards. (A baby that presents himself "sunny side up" can cause untold hours of back labour - ouch! So I thank God for His grace & mercy!). Today, he tells me causally that baby has actually engaged. I was thrilled til I remembered that for "grand multi-paras" (ladies who birth more than 3 babies) the baby can engage and disengage til one births! All due to being more elastic.

But  it did give me hope that I may, just may birth soon! Wow! I have gone post date with the last 2 so was not holding my breath for an on-time, much less an early baby! Dh says I have no faith  and I must say that I do agree with him on this.  But honestly having been hyped up to believe that later babies will come earlier and then having to wait & wait for the last 2, I tell you, it is no fun!!! Talk about developing patience!!!

But what got my hope high was that after dinner, I started to pass very soft stools. Now I am a very regular person  and I had already gone in the morning so this was extra. Then nothing! Argh!

One great side benefit of baby having engaged is that my back no longer hurts! Obviously the nerve/s she had been pressing on has been relieved. This was great! I could actually move faster and move without wincing!

I also discussed my Birth Plan with my dr. That put my mind at ease coz then I have a signed Birth Plan to wave at the nurses should I go into labour now!

18th May 2007 (Friday) - Officially 38 Weeks!
No sign of any contractions. But went to the loo 3x! Hmm....then started feeling nauseous. Am I having food poisoning? Or am I starting labour???

Surfed net - never had nausea before labour before. According to certain websites, the hormones that trigger diarrhoea can trigger nausea too! So theoretically, I could be in labour. Yay!

I was also losing the appetite to eat. And feeling extremely sleepy and tired even though I hadn't done much today.

Then....nothing! Sigh.

I should have known, right? After I am not having any noticeable Braxton Hicks contractions (BH). And it is only 38 weeks..............

19th May 2007 (Saturday)
The cot has been set up - finally. The mattress sunned. The sheets laid. The bag is packed. I even washed the sofa bed covers and sheets! I am ready.  

And so we wait...

20th May 2007 (Sunday)
And wait...

Went to the loo 3x in a row. But no contractions. What is happening?

21st May 2007 (Monday)
2:30am Woken up need to pee. Tried to go back to sleep but can't. Started to feel contractions. Dozed off.

3:30am Woken up by 5yr old whining about stuffy nose. Dh tended to him but I started to feel more contractions. Timed them for want of things to do at 3 in the morning!  There was a pattern - a contraction at every 15minutes!

This went on for 2hrs and then nothing!!! Sigh....Another false alarm.

22nd May 2007 (Tuesday)
Definitely not in labour. Sleep at night is not good. Waking up every 2hrs to pee - just a teeny weeny bit. Sigh. Sometimes I wonder why we can't be allowed to "stock up" on sleep the days leading up to birth! Afterall, we will be waking up every 2 - 3hrs once the baby is born!

Had some distraction this morning. It is dd#1's 7th birthday. Brought her to the Seletar Farm, as per her request. Not much to see nowadays save a few bunnies. Got feasted by mozzies though. Not a good idea in view of dengue period!

The heat has led to me having no appetite for breakfast nor lunch. Dd has requested an Italian dinner for tonight. Oh boy! Just the thought of Italian food and its accompanying smell is enough to make me nauseous!  Let's hope I keep the food down!

Came home and in a sudden burst of energy, changed everybody's bedlinen. Washed everything that can be washed.

Now we wait...................................

Today's BH were pretty intense. They can stop me in my tracks. But, no discernable pattern...yet.

I think the little one is waiting for daddy to finish teaching his last course tomorrow night before she makes her appearance.

I must remember that her EDD is 1st June. And I have not birthed before 39weeks. Then I won't be feeling so antsy!

23rd May 2007 (Wednesday)
Went for my weekly check up. Everything's ok. I mentioned that I have been feeling much stronger BH and pressure on the groin area. The dr said that he won't be surprised if I was already 3 - 4cm dilated! Thankfully, he didn't do a VE to confirm it! That's what I like about him - non-invasive!

So we make another appointment to see him next week.  But he seems to think I would deliver before 7th June. He's going on a week's leave then, you see.  I hope so, I certainly hope so!

24th May 2007 (Thursday)
Had a tummy upset after eating steak that was more rare than medium! Not good to get a upset tummy near your EDD! It convulses you terribly.

We had to rush down to JL to make use of some vouchers to buy newborn diapers and a pram. The pram was a great buy!

25th May 2007 (Friday) - 39 weeks!
But - nope, no signs of going into labour. Lots of BH the whole day but everytime I spot a pattern, it disappears on me.

Getting physically more tired. A missionary friend just told me that she went 18 days over her EDD with her 4th child! Arrrrggghhh!!! Lord have mercy! Lol!

26th May & 27th May 2007 (Sat & Sun)
Still here waiting.....Went to the Book Fair, hoping that all that walking around could bring on labour. But nope. baby is snug & happy in there. ALL I got out of it was 2 books or was it 3? and painful, swollen feet!

28th May 2007 (Mon)
More waiting. Don't you just hate people asking you when you are going to birth??? Like I know??? And when you tell them - oh! anytime now, they exclaim surprise that you are still traipsing around town!

And people touching your belly!!! Hey! It's called molestation!

30th May 2007 (Wednesday)
Had a check up at the clinic. Dr confidently proclaims that I will birth this weekend - I certainly hope so! We teased him, saying that we practice stoning false prophets!  He said that the baby's head had engaged - now where have I heard that before! 

Had lots of BH, including another 2hr-every 10 min contractions false alarm. I really thought I was going into labour coz the contractions were really hard and it was accompanied by the feeling of bearing down.

Although frustrating for it to not progress, I take heart knowing that all that bearing down and contractions are slowly but surely dilating and effacing (softening) my cervix. I know, I know - it is soon.

I quote my previous dr who compared birthing to the second coming of Christ : we know and even see all the signs but we do not know when He is coming. So I know and see all the signs pointing to me birthing soon, but I sure wish I knew when! It makes it all the more bearable!

31st May 2007 (Thursday)
Almost 40 weeks! And still waiting. Tomorrow is D-Day. Will she or will she not make her grand entrance on the dot? It'll be cute if she did coz then it'll make 3 of us having birthdays on the 1st of the month! And of course, it'll put me out of the misery of waiting!

Some Notes :

Braxton Hicks - These are practice contractions for the body. BH has no pattern to them and it goes away when you change positions (Eg. from standing to sitting or vice versa). Real labour contractions move along with a fixed pattern. Eg. they come on every 10minutes and last 1 minute long and then will progress to either shorter intervals between contractions - every 5min instead of 10min or each contraction will last longer - 2min vs 1 min.

Signs of Labour - There are many websites and books that outline for you the various signs of labour so I won't repeat them here. Google "Signs of Labour" and read them yourself. Diarhhoea or the passing of soft stools is one of them as your body clears itself out to make way for the baby to move through the birth canal. It also removes the need for an enema - all part of God's design!  

By the grace of God, I have finally reached Week 18 of our 6th pregnancy. It's been a long, long way!  I have never felt sicker or more tired than in the 1st 16weeks of this pregnancy. It was so bad (for me) that I had to surrender and succumbed to getting a cleaning service company to clean my house for two months!

Even bathing the children was exhausting! How ridiculous, I thought. But I just couldn't fight it. It was either get external help or feel even more sick if I insisted on doing everything myself. I was just glad I didn't throw up. Feeling nauseous all the time was bad enough.

So how did I cope? Afterall, the cleaning ladies only came in oncea week. School still had to be done, meals still had to be cooked. The basics of housekeeping still had to be performed.

Well, I just did it.  But a little at a time. I had to pace myself. And I prayed A LOT! It really forced me to rely on God and not on my own strength coz I didn't have any!

Since school was priority, we always did school first. If that wiped me out and I couldn't cook, then I ordered in. Yes, it wasn't healthy but it was better than starving! Lol! And it was only for a season.

Where housework was concerned, I started teaching my older 2 (8.5 & 6)to get even more involved than before. Yes, they were not as thorough as I would like them to be. But hey! It was still better than nothing. And they are slowly learning.

Cooking, I must confess was a real challenge. Just looking at the raw food was enough to make me nauseous. To handle it really made me gag. This is where discipline came in handy! I just did it. And quickly too! Having no help meant that I just had to do it or the children get nothing to eat. Afterall, you can only order in MacDonald's so many times a week! I couldn't even order KFC or Pizza Hut. Those made me even more nauseous.

 BTW I tried all the natural things that many said worked for them. None worked for me except drinking ice cold water. Lemon water worked for one day. Taking dry crackers/biscuits made me more sick. Vit B6 did nothing for me. Switching to a B complex worked for one day. I used to be able to eat hard boiled eggs to ease the nausea with my 5th pregnancy. This time round, it made me sick. Drinking peppermint tea helped a bit.

It is said that when one has morning sickness, the body is purging the toxins from the body and that the body is instinctively rejecting foods that are not healthy for the baby. I personally believe this. While almost everything was unappetising to me, foods with MSG, caffeine, sugar, refined carbohydrates made me feel 100 times worse. Eating simple meals in smaller and frequent quantities made me feel better. Drinking lots of ice cold water felt good!

Being tired made me feel a lot worse. My body was telling me to slow down. I had to comply or suffer the consequences. I marvel at how God has so wonderfully made our bodies! Nursing my toddler made me really nauseous and uncomfortable. I prayed to God to lead her to wean! She did. On 22nd December, 2006, 4 days before she turned 22 mths old. My longest nurser yet!

I just thank God that once I hit 16weeks, my energy level returned. I am still nauseous and I still have to watch what I eat. But with tht return of my energy level, I could start re-organising the house and de-cluttering to make space for another blessing!

Indeed what an honour it is to have found favour with God that He should bless us with another baby. The Bible says in Psalm 127 "Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, The fruit of the womb is a reward." (NKJV, emphasis, mine). May we never take for granted that it is us who controls the womb!

For births #2 and #3, my waterbag had burst before I checked myself into the hospital. So for #4, I had just assumed it would be the same.

Contractions finally started at 1.30am, early Thursday morning. They lasted 1 min & was 10 min apart. Very quickly it progressed to 7 min apart & I had a bloody show. Moved my bowels twice in that short span of time. I got up at 3am to shower & get ready. Told myself that I would only get admitted when contractions were 5 min apart coupled w/ water bag bursting. But it wasn't possible, the contractions were a bit too strong for me to hold back anymore & I really did not want to birth at home! I woke dh up at 6am (moved my bowels once more) & called my parents to come over to watch the older kids. My parents sure took the longest 30 min drive down to my place. I really thot I was going to give birth along the corridor of our apartment! Lol!

When I reached the hospital, the contractions were holding me back from walking normally so the nurses hurried to get me a wheelchair :)

Once in the delivery suite, I was (as usual) strapped to the CTG. But I was only 5 cm dilated!!!! Argh!!!! Everyone thought I was going to birth anytime soon since it was the 4th birth for me. So I wasn't even allowed to go to the toilet to relieve myself! I had to do it in the bedpan :(

From 7:30am to abt 9am, the contractions were moving along from 5 to 3 min & lasting really long. The midwife came in at abt 8am to insert an antibiotic IV drip in me coz I was diagnosed with a positive GBS infection at 38 weeks. I protested coz the dr had agreed that he would give me a jab or an oral dose instead. Unsure of what to do, she called the dr & I overheard her complaining to him that I refused the drip :) !

The dr arrived at abt 9am & told me that he would give me a jab but then almost immediately changed his mind coz he said I may still need the drip incase of excessive post partum bleeding. Sigh!!! the only "good" thing was that he only left the drip contraption on w/o the actual plastic drip tube, iykwim? Then he did a VE & said that I can deliver soon. He broke my water bag w/o informing me (grr!!!) & said ok - you can deliver now!?!?!?!!? I was placed "in position" & told to push!

Huh? I was quite irritated. I tried to push a few times with the contractions but instead of the contractions moving closer together coz of AROM, I felt them growing further apart! & on top of that I was getting tired & I could feel the bb sitting on my spine, unable to move down coz of the position I was in.

Dr then left the room (too impatient to wait?!) & left the midwives in-charge. They kept asking me to push & in the end I snapped at them - "I want to get down!" The older midwife was so shocked she said "huh?" but the younger one ran to check with dr coz I was getting down from that position regardless of what anyone says!

I got down and started to push on fours, then on my knees leaning forward, - doing whatever my body was telling me to do. I felt baby pushing down but I just couldn't get her out!

By then I was getting weary of this whole pushing thing I was soooo desperate that when the dr came back in I told him to just vacuum her out! He told me to get back on the bed & then to push again. Again I repeated - "please vacuum the baby out!" and he said "no lah! you want everything natural, including delivering your placenta out naturally. So how can you ask to vacuum the bb out? You must push her out!" Argh! Not what I wanted to hear! So I bargained with him! but he insisted and told me "you have forgotten your verse 'I can do ALL things thru Christ Jesus who strengthens me!' "

I got back up on the bed and praise God! I pushed twice and the baby pops out! BUT with the cord around her neck! So while her head was hanging out, the body had to be "delayed" while he unwinds the cord off her and then she came out! With no cry! She just laid on me while the nurse dried her & then she wailed only when they stuck the plastic tube to suction the stuff out of her mouth!

Meanwhile, I could feel the placenta sliding out of me easily. Woah! After having been pulled & tugged w/o any pain relief with #3, the natural birthing of the placenta this time was a breeze!!!

And then dh gets to trim the cord. His 1st time! And then we found out why the baby took so much more effort than the rest to come out. She was our heaviest by far - 3.5kg and her head circumference was the largest at 36cm!

Immediately my 1st thought was - next time, I will pray for a baby with a head circumference of 34cm! :)

What did I learn? That thought I wanted the waterbag to burst as a clear indication tro go to the hospital, God knew better. Being GBS positive meant that the baby was in danger of ingesting the infection if the waterbag had burst in advance. Keeping the waterbag intact till the actual birth was His way of protecting the baby from the infection. God is so good! I had no pethedine, no gas mask and I got to deliver my placenta naturally. It was awesome!

But I still felt that something was missing......

Yes, my waterbag did break but the cotnractions were only 10min apart and did not progress. Hmm...So should I go or not? To complicate matters, there was meconium in the waters passed. According to what I have read, it may signal that baby is in distress. And yet there was an incredible peace about waiting it out. So I waited and waited. I walked, I squatted, I went on all-fours but the contractions remained at 7 - 10 min apart.

This time round, my parents had been called to come and mind the children and they were also hanging around, wondering what was happening. I called a friend who said that I hsould go to the hospital "just in case". Dh and I prayed and discussed and decided that we will go to the hospital to just check the status of the baby.

Surprisingly, everyone at the hospital was very calm even when I told them that my baby had passed meconium. They did the usual exams and put the CTG monitor on to check the baby's heartbeat. The dr came in and said that baby is fine and the only "problem" was that I had to stay in bed, hooked up to the CTG coz they wanted to monitor the baby's condition closely! That was a bummer coz I did not feel comfortable. Lying down on my back always hurts!

I was all ready to argue with the dr that I didn't want to be induced. But the dr didn't bring it up at all and then he leaves to perform communion (this was a Sunday morning) at his church!

But from the moment I had checked in (slightly before 10am) till 12 nn, I was still at 4cm dilation! Althought the contractions were strong and consistent, the dilation just wasn't progressing. So I prayed. Dh prayed. Suddenly 9to me) at 1:45pm I needed to push. The mideife scuttles in to check and she yells "Call the dr!'. Lol! She claimed I was 9cm but I am sure I was a 10! She said that I needed to wait for the dr, so I took the offer of the gas mask to control the urge to push & to calm myself down.

5 pushes later - the baby came whooshing out! Drug free, pain free, Exhilarating! :)

And the best part of all was when the dr said that he was going to suggest induction so that he could go and perform communion bbut decided not to! Wow! The hand of God is mighty and protects!

At 38weeks, I had very strong contractions. It was progressing at every 7 - 10mins regularly and didn't change in pattern even when I sat up or lay down. Hmm....labour? I prayed. God didn't say to go in so I didn't. The contractions did not become closer. After 2 hrs, the contractions stopped. I was grateful that I didn't panic and checked myself into the hospital where I most likely would have been induced.

One day before EDD while reading in my bed before sleeping, I felt a strong pressure down at my cervix and with that pressure, there was a small leak of waters. Hmm....waterbag breaking? But it was such a small leak. Again, I prayed, asking for a sure sign. Then I went to bed. That was about 11pm. At 2+am, there was such a huge contraction and with that, a gush of waters came through. But, no, it didn't gush non-stop :) I immediately woke dh up and went to shower and change. After which I called my parents to come over and help with minding our #1.

By the time I checked into the hospital, it was about 3am. The nurse asked if I wanted a pethedine shot. Not knowing any better, I said ok. After the shot, I promptly fell asleep till the midwife came running in and shouting at me to not push! I was in a daze, being rudely woken up and almost immediately, I felt the bearing down sensation. They yelled for me to not push till the dr came in. It was quite hilarious. A few pushes, and the baby was out at 6am! IOW I spent only 3hrs in the hospital and I was not as tired as my first birth! Praise God! Now that was a supernatural childbirth! There was no pain! The recovery this time round was even better. The nurses couldn't believe that I had just given birth when they came into make the bed at 8am.

But I learnt something else - the pethedine shot I took with both #1 and #2 can cause a blue baby syndrome in the baby when administered too late. My room mate's baby had the condition coz her baby came out real fast. And the baby had to go into ICU for monitoring. After reading up somemore, I found out that all the drugs given to a mother during labour affects the baby somehow.

Much later on, I had friends who shared that due to the epidural they took, their babies were so sleepy, they couldn't nurse. I personally tried to help a friend to nurse her baby. But her baby was so drugged that he didn't even have the natural instinct of rooting that all newborns have! All he did was sleep! And even when bottlefed, he only took one bottle in the 3 days he was at the hospital!

Of course there are many women who took the epidural with no seen effects on either the mom or the baby but there are risks involved whenever the mum takes any drug during labour and the benefits need to be weighed carefully againt the baby's needs.

Having a few friends who have either birthed recently or going to birth in a couple of months made me reflect on my own birth stories. And I like dwelling on them coz I see so clearly the hand of God on the pregnancies, labour and birth. I would say I am one of the rare women who have had enjoyable and pleasant births :) Nothing to do with me, I may add! It is all by the grace of God and His work on the cross.

I hope that by sharing with you, I may encourage those who are about to birth or those contemplating motherhood to know that birth can be a not scary thing. But please note that every birth is different, there is no magic formula. We just can't pigeon hole God, chant some mumbo jumbo and expect God to do exactly what we want.

#1 - this birth was what I called my baptism of fire :) We had read the book Supernatural Childbirth by Jackie Mize and understaood and agreed with her that the work on the cross by Jesus has redeemed us from the curse of "sorrow" or "pain" of childbirth. But we didn't know anyone who believed in it and how it would actually work out. So when the contractions hit, we thought "this is it!" and went to the hospital on the dr's advice even though God didn't tell us to do so. Oh we prayed but we didn't wait for His answer! :( And what happened was awful.

I had to be put on a drip to "accelerate the labour" as the dr said coz my labour had stalled. He also proceded to break my waterbag. Combined, they brought on the most awful contractions that were so fast and hard that it left me gasping for air! In the beginning tho' it was still painless but after a while, there was PAIN!!! I finally caved in and took the pethedine shot and used the gas mask.

My body, which was designed perfectly by God to bear and birth babies, was being sabotaged by the drip and premature bursting of the waterbag! In a normal process, the body is able to handle each contraction as it came, releasing enough endorphins (the happy hormones) to counter each contraction. But with an artifically induced labour, the body's mechanism is short circuited.

I wanted to push but was not allowed to because I hadn't dlilated to 10cm. I spent most of the hours from 8am (when the drip was inserted & the waterbag broken) to 4pm trying NOT to push. So when it was time to push, I had no more energy! baby was finally taken out via a vacuum cap :( And I had the "requisite" episiotomy :( Besides being physically tired out, recovery was surprisingly fast. But I was sore at the bottom for about 3 - 5 days.

What did I learn? No matter what happened, God's hand was still on me and the baby. On that day in the hospital, our birth was the only natural one out of the five births that happened! Oh! The power of prayer and the grace of God!

But I knew that this was far from the Supernatural Childbirth I was meant to have. So I read up and joined discussions on email groups that spoke about a natural birth. One big mistake I made was to go into the hospital too early!

Going in too early had several consequences. One of which is that labour can stall or stop altogether. The stressful situation in the hospital (nothing beats labouring at home if you have no medical condition!) is not comfortable. So if you are near your EDD and your labour stalls, then there is most likely going to be an induction. Yucks! If the baby is due, the induction may be just a very painful way to labour. BUT if the baby is not ready to come out and there is an induction, your body will not cooperate. Contractions will not be strong enough and there'll be no dilation. But if the waterbag has been broken, the baby has to come out so a c-section will be performed!

So the main lesson I learnt was : not to go in too early!

So what can help the new mother adjust to the addition of baby into the family? From my own observations, besides prayer, there is one thing that is most important to the new mother - support and encouragement.

Support and encouragement : new mums need lots of it! After birth, the mother is physically tired (they don't call it labour for nothing! Lol!), her hormones are settling down and she is probably very emotional :) She does not need to hear any negative things that cause her to doubt her ability as a mother. We should always encourage the mother to be the mother.

What do I mean? A lot of timesI hear the well meaning grandmother or confinement lady say "Aiyah! You don't know how to carry/bathe/soothe/etc.. the baby!" And then she takes over. So how is the new mother supposed to learn how to be a mother if everytime she tries, she's taken over by the grandmother or confinement lady?

For breastfeeding mothers, they need even more support and encouragement! Breastfeeding, though is God's gift to babies, is not embraced by many. It is deemed either too difficult or for the poor :( So for those who persevere, the last thing they need to hear is "You don't have enough milk!" Our bodies produce milk according to the baby's needs and demands. But because we can't see the milk going into the baby, many presume that the milk is insuffucient. Worse is if the mother is not well endowed :(

Being there for new mothers is helpful. While our husbands can help, it often takes a fellow mother to sympathise and help another one through the rough early days. I remember crying when we had our 1st who was so difficult to handle in the early days coz he had the need to suck but got angry when I had a letdown and milk went pouring into his mouth. He would scream and yell his head off. My friend had no advice but she was there listening to me pour out my woes and her encouragement that these days will pass was helpful even tho I didn't think I would make it!

One other thing that helped me was receiving practical help from kind friends. As we have no no live-in help, any practical help offered is great :) It allowed me to concentrate on the baby and the other children instead of housework and cooking.

Last but definitely not least, pray for the new mother. Knowing that you are praying with her and for her gives her great comfort. Even as you offer practical help and encouragement, direct her back to God, for indeed as the psalmist says, "God is our refuge and strength, an ever present help in trouble. Psalm 46:1 We can't always be there for the new mother but God can. We don't always have answers for her but God does!