My twenty cents keeps moving!
May. 26, 2006
What I should have said...

Child  number 2 (Reed) is a tomboy. Makes sense--she is best buddies with child #1 who is a boy.  She holds number 3 and 4 (girls) in great disdain LOL.  I was a tomboy, so I am not sure why it bothers me so much, except that I think she really wants to be a boy.  Not in a gender altering way, or a sexual thing (she's only 7) but in a woe-is-me my-life-is-miserable -so-I-will-make -everyone- around-me-miserable kind of way.  I am sure you don't have days like that in your house, but it happens here from time to time.  Like tonight when Spenser had a friend sleep over.  A friend that Reed adores.  They are the 3 amigos (or stooges, depending on their mood LOL).  So when it was bedtime, Reed was dismayed that she didn't get to sleep with the boys, despite the fact that this same scenario has been repeated umpteen times in the past 3 years that he has been their friend.   So she started whining and I blew a gasket and fussed at her and told her the sooner she realized she was a girl, the happier we would all be.  And that she wouldn't ever get to sleep with a boy until she's married (wow imagine this same conversation in 10 years LOL and it takes on all kinds of other meanings)

Anyway I handled it poorly and she went to her room and cried herself to sleep, so now I have big mommy guilt. 

Then dh shows me a passage from Caddie Woodlawn, which he just read for some odd reason, and here's what the dad says to Caddie (who was a tomboy and had been punished by her mother for something her brothers had also done):

"Perhaps Mother was a little hasty today, Caddie," he said.  "She really loves you very much, and, you see, she expects more of you than she would of someone she didn't care about.  It's a strange thing, but somehow we expect more of girls than of boys.  It is the sisters and wives and mothers, you know, Caddie, who keep the world sweet and beautiful.  What a rough world it would be if there were only men and boys in it, doing things in their rough way!  A woman's task is to teach them gentleness and courtesy and love and kindness.  It's a big task, too Caddie-- harder than cutting trees or building mills or damming rivers.  It takes nerve and courage and patience, but good women have those things.  They have them just as much as the men who build bridges and carve roads through the wilderness.  A woman's work is something fine and noble to grow up to, and it is just as important as a man's.  But no man could ever do it so well.  I don't want you to be the silly, affected person with fine clothes and manners whom folks sometimes call a lady.  No, that is not what I want for you, my little girl.  I want you to be a woman with a wise and understanding heart, healthy in body and honest in mind.  Do you think you would like to be growing up into that woman now?  how about it, Caddie, have we run with the colts long enough?"




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May. 26, 2006 - Boy do I understand!

Posted by 5atkins


Even though we have no boys, I sometimes used to say that Hannah was my boy. (I don't say that now since she understands and is listening!) She is very energetic, loud, rambunctious, and loves to do what ever the boys are doing. She does also like to dress in princess dresses for tea parties and other girl activities too. I loved the quote from the book! That is what I should say when things like this occur! Could you write the name of the book? Is it the name you mentioned? I am interested in getting that book!
One of the things that I often quote is 1 Peter 3:3-4. Thanks for the help! Eva


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May. 26, 2006 - no pun intended

Posted by 5atkins


I just noticed that I put "boy" in my title for my first comment. It was unintentional! :) Eva


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May. 26, 2006 - I should read all before I type!

Posted by 5atkins


I just noticed your reading list for third grade. I wrote down the name and author of the book. Thank you! Sorry for all the comments! :) Eva


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May. 26, 2006 - Here I am again!

Posted by 5atkins


I now read your list for 6th grade. I have just been reading The Golden Goblet to prepare to read it out loud for our history curriculum (Veritas Press - 2nd grade). I was wondering if you chose this because it was a a Newberry Honor Book or if it went with curriculum. I have enjoyed reading it! I will probably spend a lot of time comparing how it would be different if the boy believed in God and His providence. I have enjoyed the book, although I prefer more dialogue for our read alouds, but that is just me! :) I'm really going this time! Eva


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May. 27, 2006 - Untitled Comment

Posted by bigredriver


That is a great quote..........makes me want to stop being a tom-boy too.
(I'm 51 and hide it!)


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May. 27, 2006 - I am having the same problem

Posted by ktneis


My 12 yr old dd is such a boy, she even walks like her dad and has developed some of her dads behaviors. She tries to please me by shopping for girl clothes but we cannot agree, she fortunately is also very modest. She is the best girl I could ever have but she enjoys everything boy, except her American Girl Dolls. She reinacts the books with them but nothing else girl. We have not read our CaddieLawn book yet so I will put that on her reading list. Thank you for sharing that page. I know that when she gets older she will blossom into a strong women who will be able to take care of herself. She will always be kind and compassionate to others. Thankfully she is that.


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