Dec. 20, 2005
Things on my heart today...
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There is so much on my mind today... I have tested for two days and still am LH neg. So I have not ovulated, which is what I am waiting for so I can start using the progestrone cream...It is day 12 and I am already suffering, Headaches, B. tenderness, and the like. But more important then myself and my sufferings , on my heart is my Grandmother Martha Bradt. Pray for her ok. She is 91 years old, I have been trying to tend to her while living here in Oswego Co, NY. She is forgetting things and she is not caring well for herself. I am fearing she is at the age that someone needs to care for her, yet she is so independent in her own mind that she is fighting it . Today she had my uncles wife call my mom, saying that she wanted me to come and help her with court paperwork , she wouldn't allow my uncle to do it, as he wants her to plead guilty to something she doesn't remember doing. ie. running a red light when driving...that is right, she still drives, but now says she doesn't want to anymore...Well that could be a blessing, but she would need someone to come care for her or for her to live with someone... My uncle is looking out for himself, that isn't new... He now owns her land and has a house on it. She is to have life use of it... Ya right... in a 44 year old mobile home that is rotting floor and wall wise and the roof leaks, but that has been home to her for 31 years on that land... and now she faces loosing that independence, untill she goes home to be with the Lord... In alot of ways I do not want to be the one to take that from her, but yet I want her to be safe and well cared for in her last days or years of life... 
Oh, Lord please help me to know what is right and loving to do for
her... Unless you have been in the same place you
cannot know the heartache that I am feeling, she has always been the
woman of faith in my life...She is not easily angered, she was the wife
who was quiet, for the most part and served her husband till he
died...that was 31 years ago when my grandfather died from a heart
attack, he had emphasema (spelling is off, but you get the idea)
He was not an easy man to please, but she cooked , cleaned, worked,
took care of her children and worked too. She always listened to her local radio station, she attended church with us when younger and she always talked of the Lord... Now when she talks she talks of the past alot, she gets confused and she forgets things I thought she would never forget... But yet she remembers somethings like it was yesterday... So where is my heart at ? Its stuck in I suppose the thought that I could loose her anyday... She has an anurism near her heart, she isn't eating well, nor is she drinking enough water. Sigh... I live here for a short time longer till we move to our new home, which is an hour and a half from here. If she stays here, my uncle will not care for her properely, he works now and his wife is not into caring for grandmother... My mother now works and my dad is retired but he is not in the greatest of health to care for her, he is diabetic and well there is a rift there, that I cannot repair between him and his family... Pray for my Dad to hear the Lord's heart on this and for him to turn his heart toward the Lord and love. Sigh... If I could get Grandma Meg as she likes to be called to agree to come live with me in the new house, I could care for her, but I know that has to be a large work of the Lord in her heart to choose to change so much in her final years, but it could mean her living longer and making a godly impact on the lives of my own children. You should see her read to my girl's...smile She reads this phonics book to Faith 3 and Hope 2 ... all pictures with small words, but it goes something like this.... Oh, look girls, here is the PIE that Mom baked, oh and here is the PLATE we put it on.... Here is the TRUCK that Daddy drives, oh you can fit so much in the back of that truck... All Mark and I could do is look at eachother and watch her with the girls, for only a few seconds before they were fighting over that book till she took it away and told them to get on the couch near her... Part of me sees all the beauty she brings into life as she touches it .... Yet I do not want to loose that. I don't want to let go I guess... Though I know someday the Lord will call her home and I will have no Grandmother to see and visit. You know in my mind I remember all the things she did with my Sister Jeanette and I, all the places she took us. I remember her sitting next to me in church as a teen and her singing with me. She knitted our mittens and sweaters, she helped buy our winter coats when my parents couldn't. She bought my college books when I couldn't and asked for nothing back in return... She has always been the blessing in my life... Yet here she is saying " Don't make me the Baby ". You are doing too much, you've done enough.... And my heart knows that I have done very little actually to repay her for all she has done for me , all she has shown me and taught me in life. I can remember her in my mind as back as 5 years old, but in photos I can see her there since a wee baby... What I would give to care for her like she has me... She has given her all for everyone else in life... Yet so few have not the time to give to her... Well I do... Even if I am homeschooling my children, even if I am having more children (if the Lord so allows such to happen) What little it is to take her in, care for her and share daily life with her, untill the Lord says its time Martha to come home with me... You know the Bible says for he who knows to do right and doesn't do it, its sin... and As ye have done unto the least of these, so have ye done to me... Facing loosing someone you love is never easy... But doing what is right in the sight of the Lord God is the only thing to do... I so love my Grandmother Martha, if only my family could live for the Lord and care for those who need the most caring for, without selfishness and with a heart for the Lord...Do so as unto him and him alone... Dispite the past and pressing on to the future... Making her the Grand Lady in our family... But you would think that is too much to ask of some... I love you Grandmother, to me you will always be the Grandest Lady in our family... Love Linda |
Dec. 11, 2005
Home, Health and Happiness
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From
my home to yours this morning I want to come and share some things I
have been learning about, perhaps these things will bless some of you
sisters. Perhaps it will lead to better understanding of health and
happiness and allow some of you to know me for who I truely am inside
and what has been happening in my life the last several years. I want to first and formost appologize to any sister i offended in the past, due to how I word things or things I might have said in anger or maybe just not thinking before I spoke. And I am asking for forgiveness for this area in my life where I was not so controlled at times. Its not that I think standing on the Word was wrong to do, but I could have handled it better in the past and I am going to be doing that now, so as to offend no one, Lordwilling. Keep me in your prayers as I heal and try to get healthy. I will tell you I have surely been a mess and in need of help and healing from the Lord God. I try to search out natural health for myself and my family, so this lead to reading several books on Womanly Health. The books i have read recently are the following: What your Dr may not tell you about Premenopause What your Dr may not tell you about Menopause What your Dr may not tell you about Breast Cancer All by Dr. John Lee In my reading I learned so much about womanly health that it wasn't funny, you know you think you grow up learning all their is to know about it, but we do not know much at all. So in my quest for Health in a Natural way, which I feel is God's Way, I learned that Hormones can reek havoc in your life... I am not sure how many of you have heard these sayings...excuse the boldness or crudness of some of them ok... Your Hormonal... you will get over it... She's on the rag... Its her time of the month... Don't you hate it, it makes you feel downgraded as a woman which the Lord God made us to be and well why is it this world looks down on women so much ? I will freely admit that there are things as a woman I did not enjoy going through. Bleeding, Cramps, Clotting, Flooding, Mood Swings ( Sis Peggy I can say you may have been right that I seemed like two different people in years past, I can happily say I am of sound mind and do not have multiple personalities !!!! ) Nausea, Headaches, Low or changing blood sugar levels, insomnia, bloating, weight gain ( the kind that doesn't want to come off no matter what you do) There is so many more things I suffered but you get the point... I had no Joy in anything in life most the time and the things I did enjoy well circumstances took those things I loved to do or enjoyed away from me. Do I think the Lord allowed this for a good reason ? YES.... So I would seek Him, His ways and a more healthy way to live and eat and heal myself and my family. Sisters, being hormonally imbalanced and or estrogen dominant isn't a funny thing, it is a painful , heartbreaking thing to suffer through. I want you to know you must take charge of your health care and not just take your Dr's word for things. My OB has been telling me for two years my tests are all fine, my hormone levels are just fine... But I know better after reading these books and looking at all the things I suffered through . Also I have looked at the ways that women suffer needlessly through things that can be helped when they say there is no cure for things. Things like Cancer of the Breast, Cervix and Uterus. Let's face it , some health issues are warning signs of more serious things to come if we do not heed the warnings the Lord gives us and Change our Diets, Excercise and Health Care and most importantly our veiw of things and Our lifestyle and Family's stress level... STRESS...did you get that part, it can make you litterally ill. Right now I need to ask for prayer, for myself healthwise. As you know I recently lost a baby in November. Right now I am Bleeding alot heavier then I normally do, but I can at least tell you I know why I am and I intend to do something to help remedy the issues I face in this life. And with the Lord's help I will strive to be more healthy and more learned in the things to care for myself and my family. Ladies without caring for yourselves, who will care for your family ? Love, Cook , Bake, Clean, Do Laundry, Homeschool, your Husband and Children.... I am going to in the coming months, Lordwilling days share with you what I have learned and what I am doing about it and How the Lord is blessing me and Healing me. We will be moving soon, the abstract and survey are back on the new house.PTL for this... Its been a long wait to in a couple weeks we should be moving to our new home and finally getting back to some sort of normal in our lives. Its been a learning exsperience for sure... May the Lord Bless you and enrich your lives as you serve him in your home, Love Linda PS: I am going to use Emirta Natural Progestrone Cream, this can be found locally here in NY at Nature's Marketplace in Wegmans or online at www.emirta.com (Do not use creams containing Wild Yam or Soy , if it is derived from Yam it is fine. Make sure it says that and is USP Natural Progestrone and that it meets the specifications that Dr. Lee states in his books and apply it to areas of the skin that are thiner or you blush, face, neck, hands, inside of arms, chest area. Also do not exceed the recommended amount of usage that he suggests for the symptoms your suffering. Anyone with more questions can email me at thecountryhomemaker@yahoo.com and I will be happy to share what I have learned with you and help you if you want to share your sufferings with me. These books are for all women to read and good learning tools for teaching our daughters the truth of womanly health. I also highly recommend Shondra Parker's books: Naturally Healthy Woman Naturally Healthy Pregancy Mommy Diagnostics and her herbal courses, which I intend to take in the near future myself, but her books are so good and also a learning tool in teaching our daughters and ourselves. |
Dec. 3, 2005
" Sold the Farm " and Other Things that happened in November 05
Posted in Faithful Acre Farm
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Well
it is official, the farm closed Nov 21st, 2005. So we are right now
awaiting the closing on our new home, Lordwilling in the next couple
weeks. Alot has happened in November. November 1st we went to see the house again , that we wanted to buy. November 4 I learned I was pregnant. November 5th I started bleeding. Nov 8th had a sonogram that showed I had miscarried, but my hormone levels were higher so they thought I had an eptopic pregnancy. November 9th, I had surgery , DnC and Laporoskpy.( My tubes are fine PTL and all they found was empty sack from the baby that I was carrying and I know this baby is safe in heaven with Jesus as I write this. I was sore for a couple weeks from the incisions, also suffering still from a hematoma in my hand and arm, from my IV site not being taken care of correctly. Its mending but is sore, made my veins inflammed and sore for sometime, I can still see one that is inflammed and bruised yet. November 21st the closing on the farm happened after 3 months waiting. We are glad it is finally over and we can get into our new home, well its not new, its a 1900 home with 4 or 5 bedrooms, 1 1/2 baths, full cellar and it will be so nice to be in a real home and not in a double wide any longer. November 29th, relisted my mobile home in fulton NY with the realtor for 2 months , Lordwilling she will be able to sell it. It is in a fairly nice park with big lots, rather country with all the conviences of laundrymat, store, gas station right across the road from the park. Anyone interested in buying it can call 315-697-3894 and ask for Maryanne Barndollar. It is a 1997 Titan 3 bedroom , 2 full baths, Livingroom with fireplace, Kitchen dining combo with a seperate laundryroom rear entry. Master Bedroom has a walk in closet and the master bath has a garden tub. It will be getting a few updates in the coming weeks but it is a lovely home. Asking $20,000.00 I am looking to sell it outright as I will be 2 hours away and do not really want to rent it anymore. Its been a good rental but it is alot of work for me to travel back and forth to do things. I am a homeschooling mom with 4 children at home and do not have the time to spend on being a landlord anymore. Blessings, Linda |
Nov. 15, 2005
Trials, Prayer and Answers...
Posted in Family
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Well its November already and finally the farm is suppose to close on Monday the 21st. Its been a long time coming that is for sure, but you know that all things happen in the Lord's time, not in ours. We have an accepted offer on a new home for us that is near Oneida Lake, near Canastota NY where Mark grew up. So lordwilling we will be able to close and move before mid December. There is alot of work to do on my trailer, I am still hoping the Lord will sell it for us so we need not be landlords anymore. In the last three weeks Mark was in the hospital for a week, I learned i was exspecting, then three days later started bleeding, lost the baby, had surgery and now I have a nasty cold. Rest and chicken soup is on the list for here. Prayers are coveted by me if you feel so led. Seems the Lord has shown me so much in the last few weeks and its not all been easy but its all been for his glory.
Your's in Him Blessings, Linda |