I know this isn't a popular theme on here, and a lot of people seem to think that if you try to honor God in obeying His law that you are legalistic. I don't want to get into an argument here with anyone, but I just want to process some thoughts I've had and hopefully find an answer to the conflict that has arisen between my dh and I regarding the Sabbath.
Ever since last fall, I felt the Lord showing me that His Old Testament was every bit a part of His love letter to His church as His New Testament. I felt like He wanted me to study His laws, and do my best to obey them - not as a way to seek my salvation, but as a way to honor Him. I feel obeying His laws not only shows my love to Him, but also it is a way for me to have a standard in my life. It gives me a focus...not only for what is holy, but also for what is the best way to live. I've found that the Lord blesses those who observe His laws. When I keep the Sabbath, I am blessed. I'm finding that His dietary laws are not just random, but really healthy for me and my family. As the Lord shows me other parts of His Old Testament teachings that He wants me to do, I will put them into action. From my understanding some of the laws have to do with the levitical priests, or with the Temple. Those things obviously don't pertain to me.
On Friday my dh called and told me that he wanted to go fishing with his buddies. I was already having a rough day with the girls regarding school and feeling pressured to get the house clean before sundown, when I like to start the Sabbath. I got frustrated with him because I was planning a special meal to start the Sabbath and he wasn't going to be there. He had already told me that he would be spending the whole day Saturday fishing and looking for good hunting spots. I told him okay to go, but it was really a breaking point for me and I was having such a hard time dealing with the stress of it all that I cancelled school for the rest of the day and just tried to get myself under control. I really don't expect Tim to think and do things the way I do, but my emotions were already so exacerbated by dealing with the kids that day that I couldn't get them under wraps. The rest of the day I worked on housekeeping and finishing supper. Tim changed his mind and didn't go with his buddies either day, even though I asked him to do whatever he wanted to do. Saturday ended up being somewhat tense, but we did talk about it yesterday.
The challenge I have now is finding a way to honor God in His laws without dishonoring my husband. I must find a way to observe what I feel God would have me observe without making my dh feel like I'm being legalistic. If I am unable to keep every letter of the law, I know that I am not condemned, because Jesus knew I couldn't keep myself blameless, and He already died for me to pay for those times. On the other hand, that is no reason to continue to deliberately dishonor God's teachings! Besides that, the laws are good, and I am blessed, and my family is blessed if we do them.
Please pray for me as I continue to learn and grow in these things.
Oh, I've been there. I can feel your sadness and frustration. Thankfully the sun keeps on bringing us a new day. I pray that things will go better next week and the stress will lessen. Maybe some time alone in the woods will help clear your mind and regulate your emotions... as women, mom's, wives, teachers, housekeepers...etc we need that sort of down time to ourselves (and it is never the right time to take it).
I just saw your comment. I know, I cried a lot during the first book! They were so mean to Elsie when she didn't deserve it! Yes the second book is much more cheerful, altho, Arthur almost pushes Elsie to her death because she won't help him with a problem. But I love the way she bears all the mishaps and faults that everyone treats her with. I was so glad to see that Mr. Dinsmore is so loving towards Elsie now... you would be surprised how much she and he have changed. :)
Thank you for coming by!
Love,
Rachel
http://dixonhomestead.com/rachel
I would like to encourage you to really pray about the decisions you feel would be best for your family, with the understanding that your husband is the head of your home, so you fall under his protection. I have been taught that tradition is just as important as the letter of the law, and so the tradition of having Sunday as a day of rest is completely valid. Whatever decisions you make must be for the glory of God and the harmony of your household. When we force something that is not natural or comfortable to all, we create strife. Your marriage is a covenant that you and Tim made before God, and this must be honored before anything else.
This is a bit disjointed, but I just really want you to know that I am praying for you, and to encourage you to look at your home as a peaceful place that everyone wants to be. We, as mothers and wives, set the tone of the home (whether we like it or not somedays; for me 'someday' was yesterday), and our comfort and peace will transmit to comfort and peace to our husbands and children. To pray over something and make changes without including our husbands in the process is a recipe for disaster. I speak from personal experience; I have no idea what your experiences are - I'm only telling you what I find to be true in my own home.
Have a peaceful, prayerful day, and I'll visit you again a little later.
love,
Shani
First off, I was reading through your school plans post. Wow! Girlfriend, how do you do it? I'd lose my head in trying to keep it all straight! You must be so very well organized; I like to think that I am, too, but I know when to take my hat off and bow down! (smile)
I would not presume to tell you how to manage your marriage; you guys are much more to each other and for each other than you could possibly put into words in a public forum like this, so saying, "Do this or do that" would not begin to, in its own right, solve a problem. These things I do know:
1) Pray Phillipians 4:8 and then leave it in God's hands.
2) God has you, your marriage, and everything that concerns you in His hands. He tells us in Proverbs 3:3-6 to trust not our own understanding, but to follow Him, acknowledging Him and He will direct our paths. I would invite you to be obedient to Him; He already knows what to do with your husband and how to align your home.
2) Our walk is our walk, not someone else's. My husband and I went through a similar situation years back when I began to grow by leaps and bounds spiritually, and his antenna was only up a little ways, so to speak. He said to me one day, "You're changing right before my eyes." He didn't mean it as a total compliment, either. But I stayed with what God called me to do, and I never pestered my husband about not feeling the same as I did or taking the path with me. I think that the fact that he wasn't pressured now has him growing by leaps and bounds, in a different season, and totally at peace because it's about he and God, not about being nagged by his wife regarding what to do/what not to do.
4) I'm not saying to neglect your husband in any way. It may take some hard looks at your activities and time, but if he feels that his needs are still being met in the midst of your growth and commitment, it sure makes your life easier.
I hope something in what I've said helped, and thanks so much for thinking of me. You had been on my mind for days. Also, I love your new hairstyle! Are you going to cut it or let it continue to get longer?
Belinda@With a Taste of Chocolate
www.homeschoolblogger.com/bbullard
I have been thinking about you all day, ever since I read your daybook post this morning.
Thanks for explaining yourself a little better and 'putting yourself out there' in blogland. I felt like I wanted to respond more this morning, but now I have a better understanding.
Anyhow, I have had times where I have felt more spiritually 'in tune' than my husband, but what I have learned is that I needed to not make myself appear 'holier'. God gave you your husband, He created marriage, He wants it to work, it's your covenant together with HIm, He is not going mind if you honour your husband's wishes.
Remember to pray for your husband, he is a blessing to you, not a hindrance...not even to what God has been teaching you.
Keep a meek and gentle spirit, I believe that if you let it go, honour your husband, that God will bless and honour you.
I know that what you are learning is all good things, but if your husband is not on the same page, you have to keep some perspective. Your husband is not evil and he's not asking you to be immoral or do illegal things. Although I've never met him, I'm sure that he loves you and wants the blessing of fulfilling his role as head of the family.
I realize this is beginning to be a long post, I hope that you will take what I have said, kindly. I do want to offer encouragement and I hope it has come across that way!
As I said in my earlier post, I will pray for you.
It's me again... but on Tuesday. Well, guess what? I am about to hit my 500 blog entry tomorrow... In celebration, I've created a DVD give-a-way on my blog for those who participate in Weblink Wednesday. Come on by and take a look. It might be something you might want to consider entering. Fun stuff!
Oh Carol, I am so sorry you had such a day. ( doesn't that sound just like a Bubbe!) The Sabbath Rest is such a gift from God. It is joy and celebration of the completion of the week.The blessings are just that, Blessings , The Light, the Light of the World kindled not only on the table, but in our hearts, The fruit of the Vine, the Bread of the Earth all of these are moments of Thanksgiving and gratefulness. Oh Sweet sister it is Communion with our God and our Family. When it becomes all about the Command and duty, It looses its flavor just as salt without its saltiness is useless. You would not sit in service at Church and take Communion in anger and frusration, nor would you prepare it for your brothers and sisters in your church and serve it with an angry no-one-cares-about-my-preparations-heart.
God truly did make the Sabbath "for" man and not man for the Sabbath. When it becomes all about the ritual it is at the expense of the relationship. Jesus prefers the relationship over the ritual. Jesus is not the one putting the pressure and the high expectations on you. He is however giving you the intense desire to draw nearer and closer to Him, to spend time with HIm and to focus on Your love for each other. In doing that, it will spill over to your husband and children.
Do you remember the first meal you cooked and presented to your husband? The way you looked at him across the table? The Joy in presenting him the love you stirred into that meal and the fear that it would be rejected? Your desire at that moment wasn't to be the best cook in the world ,it was to show him how much you loved him. And Carol, That is what the Sabbath is, showing HIm how much you love Him. The difference is, no matter how messed up it is when we present it to Him, there is no fear because "There is no fear in Love and He loves you completely." Let His Grace cover you and remember another shabbat is coming!
Lastly when my daughter got married women in the church filled a book with wise words to live by. One she has clung to is "Love without Expectations"
And that is what I will leave you with here.
Because of Jesus, Bobbie
Although I would love to follow the same convictions of keeping the sabbath laws, this is would cause great strife for me. So for now it is one more area where I pray and wait.
I have a friend who used to write articles for wives and mothers. She had posted two great pieces on when a husband and wife don't have the same conviction. Here is the link:http://fitlyspoken.blogspot.com/2004_11_01_archive.html. Scroll down past the Advent devotionals.
Thank you for your sweet comments on my blog.
Blessings,
Linda
I want to encourage you to seek God for wisdom and strength. I understand your conviction. I am also a Sabbath Keeper and our family loves the Sabbath. My husband has quite a story to tell how his parents struggled over the Sabbath/Sunday issue. It took a lot of time for them to be on the same page. Even as a teenage kid, my husband spent a lot of time in prayer asking God to help his parents understand the truth. I am praying for you and your family. God bless you as you seek to obey Him. Email me if you like. safords@hotmail.com Angela
As you stated, God will bless you for following His laws. I myself am a Sabbath keeper, and have had to deal with many of the society tugs regarding the issue. Thankfully, my husband also keeps the Sabbath and it is not an issue with us. I will be praying for you, and if you want to talk, just drop me an e-mail. djbartch @ yahoo . com
One thing have I desired of the Lord that will I seek after: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life. To behold the beauty, the beauty of the Lord. To inquire in His temple, the temple of the Lord.
This is my everyday thoughts about being a mother to three little ladies (11, 9 and 4) and a two year old son. We serve God full-time, and I am a physician assistant. I have the most awesome husband in the world. I am trying to seek and serve God with all my heart, all my soul, all my mind and all my strength.
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