Under His Construction

• Mar. 6, 2008 - Mr. Harvey Newcomb's Advice on Honoring Parents

Most everything I post on my blog is a little glimpse into the heart of my home, my thoughts and the lessons God is teaching me. I truly enjoy sharing these tidbits with you all, especially when God brings something to me that causes me to stop and ponder the far reaching application it has on my life. In a recent post I mentioned how God has often used great books as a catalyst in this santification process in my life. I promised to begin sharing these great books with you and since I am reading so many great ones lately I have much to share! The kiddos and I are currently reading through an exceptional book titled 'How to Be a Lady' by Harvey Newcomb. I know, I know - you are thinking "but I thought she has three boys." I do and had only purchased this book with the intention of reading it to my daughter, but as I started to preview the book I was struck with how relevant most of it is for boys and girls. And it can't hurt to give my boys a vision of Biblical womanhood to aide them someday in the selection of a godly wife. The book was first published in 1850 and offers some first hand insight into the 'problems' Christians were seeing in society back then. Oh to have these be the only problems in culture today! I love Mr. Newcomb's gentle style of writing, which seemed to be the standard for children's books from this period. While these two attributes are enough reason alone to read the book, the best attribute is found within the practical and timeless advice for living out the Scriptural truths presented.  Our reading this morning was in chapter 4 ,'filial piety', where Mr. Newcomb delves into what is means to honor your mother and father. Wow! How short we have fallen in this area. Here are a few excerpts that really struck me: "Obedience must be prompt and cheerful. Your parents are not honored, when obedience is delayed to suit your convenience; nor when you answer back, or try to reason against your parents' commands, or plead for delay, that you mat first finish your own work. A parent who is honored will never have to repeat the same command." "Neither is sullen obedience honoring your parents. Some children, who dare not disobey their parents, will go about doing what is required of them with great reluctance, with perhaps a sullen expression of the countenance, a flirt, an angry step, or a slam of the door, or some other show of passion. Such conduct is a grief to parents, and an offense against God, who will not count that as obedience, which is not done cheerfully." Mr. Newcomb goes on to address the importance of honoring your parents whether they are present or not (Ah yes - the Biblical principle of Self-Government) by keeping their parent's authority with them always. He also addresses how our children's general behavior in public is a show of honor or dishonor according to how they behave. Here is what he says: "If they are rude and uncivil, they reflect dishonor upon their parents; for people say, they have not been trained and instructed at home. But when their behavior is respectful , correct, pure, and amiable, it reflects honor upon the parents. People will judge of the character of your parents by your behavior.  Are you willing to hear your parents reproachfully spoken of?No, your cheeks would glow with indignation at the person who should speak ill of your father or your mother. But you speak evil of them, in your conduct, every time you do any thing that reflects dishonor upon them in the eyes of others. The blame of your conduct will be thrown back upon your parents."  This is really just a small taste of this book, let alone this chapter! There is so much more that I would love to share (like his comparison of our soul - our will, judgement, conscience, feelings, etc. - with the inner workings of a watch from chapter 3!)  I am being blessed daily by the self-examination this book is bringing about in my heart and in my childrens' hearts. I look forward to getting my hands on more of Mr. Newcomb's books.

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