My mother and I had a conversation today (again) about Tanner getting older (he will be 12 this month).  She seems to think that unless I expose Tanner to lots and lots of kids, that he will be "warped".  She says he needs to go to school so he can be exposed to children on a regular basis.  She says we need to let him go out with friends.  She preaches this to me every chance she gets.

My question is, how many of you out there agree with her?

I completely disagree, but maybe I am a minority.  I feel he gets plenty of interaction with other children.  We go to our homeschool group activities on a regular basis and he takes a pottery class twice a week with other kids.  I feel this is plenty of time for him to interact with children.  I don't believe turning him out in the world, with no one to watch over him is acceptable.  I look at the things 12 year old children are doing and what they are exposed to in public school and it frightens me.  My mother talks about my nephew, who is 4 months younger than Tanner, taking girls out on "dates".  My brother takes him and his "girlfriend" to the movies, to the skateboard park, etc., drops them off, and picks them up hours later.  She talks about all the trouble he gets into because he lies to his parents, he doesn't come home when he's supposed to after school and he argues with them CONSTANTLY.  My children are only exposed to children who have similar backgrounds and beliefs.  My children are learning my husband's and my morals and beliefs before turning them out into a world that tells them it's o.k. to do whatever they want as long as it feels good.  Is keeping them on a short leash a bad thing?  Is my nephew having experiences that will prevent him from being "warped"?  I don't think so, but maybe I don't know as much as I think I do.

My mom, who works for a police department, never goes into detail about cases she's worked on, but I can always tell when she's been working on a particularly bad case involving children.  She always tells me to watch my children closely, that I don't know what horrible things adults (and other children) can do to children.  Yet days like today I hear how I need to give him his freedom.  He's TWELVE (or at least he will be in a few weeks).  Does such a young boy, need that kind of freedom?  Should I be taking him and a "girlfriend" to a movie and dropping them off for hours on end?  I don't think so.

Yes, we live in an area with very few children, so we don't have kids in and out of our home all day.  The children in our neighborhood who are the same age as Tanner have parents who work in the public school, so of course, we have cooties or something.  They won't even look at us, let alone allow their children to go across the street to the park with our children.  Still, do I want my children to go to the park with girls who have their bellybuttons pierced at the ripe old age of 11 and wearing clothes that resemble lingerie?  Do I want my son to start thinking these boys with their baggy pants, pierced ears and lips and mohawks are "cool"?  No way.

I think my children will grow up just fine with a limited circle of friends and a limited amount of freedom.  I think, until they are much older, they don't need to spend a whole lot of free time away from us.  I think that's the only way they are going to grow up to be responsible, caring and moral adults.

What do you think?