I know that I need to trust God. I know that we are blessed beyond measure....but why is it so hard to really feel it sometimes?
Right now my husband works full time+....about 6 days a week. He also delivers a newspaper at 4:30 am every day. We are cleaning a Mennonite friend's store once a week. And we still are struggling financially. My 13 year old and 3 year old are sharing a twin mattress because we don't have the money for another. They really don't mind....but it seems silly.
I fasted monday for our finances. Then Tuesday our main car broke down. My husband took it to a garage that some people at our church owned. Well....they no longer owned it.....the former owner who has "taken" us before ownes it again. Well, my husband told the guy to figure out what was wrong and give it an oil change. Later he found out that the guy fixed it without asking or telling us what was wrong and expects $280 now. Doesn't take credit. Now others have told me that isn't legal....but my husband is too nice....he will say that our Christian witness would be to pay the guy.
Oh yeah.....we got a car given to us for $1.....so we could have parked the other car for awhile until we could affford the repair. So my husband goes to register the car and it cost us $144 for license plates, etc.
Well....we got $300 for Christmas. We had spent $50 already, but I guess we won't be buying the mattress or garabe disposal with the rest. Even after using that and wiping out our sad savings, we still owe the guy $$80.
I just don't understand why we can't get our finances to be better. We tithe, we don't overspend.
To top that off...a friend of mine is probably buying the house in the country that we have been praying over for the last 6 months. We really felt that God was going to bless our finances to move. I guess i was wrong.
Do I have to add that the roof is leaking, the dishwasher is falling apart, literally, and one of our toilets just broke.
What a week. | 
Jan. 15, 2008 - Dear, sweet mom!
You have prayed. You have been faithful. You have fasted. Your heart for your finances is more tender than a great many whether blessed, or less-blessed. Please know that you inspire me with your heart to do what the Lord desires with your earning and spending!
My favorite verse is, "As the eyes of the servant look toward the hand of the master. . ."
When we are faithful servants, and when we look toward His hand for everything (earning, spending, saving, etc.), we are blessed!
Notice how the enemy was wanting you to feel "pressed" when you fasted and prayed? Suddenly, you are faced with a new challenge, and it hurts. I'm so sorry about that! I hate when the world's "stuff" breaks and we are impacted badly.
I'm praying for you!
He is faithful. Before you knew it, you were blessed with resources to manage this trouble. (Praise Him for that.) The car is fixed, but under less that lovely circumstances. (Praise Him it's fixed, and ask what your next step needs to be with this business owner. BBB? Maybe...and maybe not.) You managed to keep your integrity with the owner, and that may be worth something in the end. It's worth something to Jesus, we know.
In the secret moments, I pray that you will keep your godly heart...keep your peace...keep your integrity. I pray that He will open the floodgates of heaven with blessings for you. I also know that it's His good, perfect and pleasing will we want...not anything else!
Comfort and blessings to you! He is gooooooood!
Jennifer