Apr. 5, 2006 Suffer the Little Children To Come Unto Me
In my ongoing series on motivation, I have been examining the eight spiritual needs of the child as laid out by Carole Adams in, The Christian Idea of the Child. The third idea she lays out is that of acceptance:
Children must acquire an adequate self-value, based upon their acceptance of their own individuality as a gift from God. Adult treatment of the child communicates unmistakably of his worth and potential.
In our culture, we tend to worship the self. Concerns over self esteem issues in children have lead to movements against games with a loser in public education settings, including musical chairs. Grading systems have changed so that children cannot as easily decipher whether they have 'passed' or 'failed' so as not to damage their sense of self worth. This goes back to a theory proposed by Abraham Maslow in 1943 which has been adapted and is still widely discussed, especially in education and psychology coursework at American Universities.
In his 1943 paper, A Theory of Human Motivation, Maslow proposed a hierarchy of needs that is often depicted as a triangle. Physical needs lie at the bottom, and the pinnacle of human achievement is the concept of "self actualization." Some of its ideas are very good, and it certainly made needed advancements in previous notions of motivation, but there are definite problems with the concept, particularly for the Christian, several of which are outlined in Psychology as Religion: The Cult of Self Worship, by Paul Vitz. It is important to note that self actualization is held as a valid theory and a noteworthy goal by most educators and psychologists. If you read through the linked articles, you will see a close relationship between the ideals laid out for the 'self actualized' individual and those of the New Age movement.
Carole Adams, however, makes it clear that a child's sense of worth must come from "[his] acceptance of [his] own individuality as a gift from God." His worth is not in his own doing, but in being created in the image of God. We each have unique personalities, talents and interests, each of which may bring glory to God. The Foundation of American Christian Education further discusses the Principle of Individuality:
Everything in God's universe reveals His infinity and diversity. Each person is a unique creation of God, designed to express the nature of Christ individually in society. Parents and teachers should cultivate the full potential of Christ in every child.
As we learn to submit to the headship of Christ and teach our children to do the same, we move away from self-centered models of motivation to one which is spirit controlled. And the Lord direct your hearts into the love of God, and into the patient waiting for Christ. (2 Thessalonians 3:5)
One of the most interesting ways I have seen this illustrated to the child is through the timeline, or Chain of Christianity, recommended in the Principle Approach materials. The timeline has ten key links, beginning with Creation, ending with the Restoration (present) and Christ is presented as the focal point of history. The child places his picture under the Restoration to remind himself daily of his role in Christ. No matter what path he ultimately takes in life, so long as it is in Christ, he is an important part of God's plan. Here's a picture of this timeline in action (while Honeybee might not have had her kids put their pictures up on the timeline, at least she has one. We STILL haven't done ours.)
Some time ago, I did some study on the verse, "Train up a child in the way he should go and he will not depart from it." I found some interesting thoughts. The original Hebrew reads more like this:
Initiate (or dedicate) a [person of stature/squire] in the mouth of his way and he will not turn from it.
In a very informative article, Proverbs 226a: Train Up a Child? Ted Hildebrandt raises some interesting discussion about the words in this verse and how they are used elsewhere in scripture. Anyone who has read this blog very long knows I can go on and on about words, definitions and etymology and will readily see why I find this article so fascinating. Get out your bible and your Strong's, or better yet, download a free copy of esword and follow along through this study.
His application at the end, whether you accept his thoughts are not, bear direct relevance to the thoughts on acceptance outlined by Carole Adams in her article:
This idea of initiating someone with an appropriate level of dignity, respct and responsibility aslo fits well in a familial setting. The late adolescent (rfana) should be treated with dignity and respect in view of creation (Gen 2) and redemption (Rev 20, etc.). Thus he should be given experience, training, status, and responsibilities correspondent to his role in the kingdom of God. An adolescent should be initiated into the adult world with celbrations. His status as a redeemed image bearer should demand parental involvement in terms of opening horizons, patient instruction, and loving discipline. It is his dominion destiny and status that the parent must keep in mind. The parent must not violate the adolescent's personhood by authoritarian domination, permissive allowance of immaturity, or overprotection from the consequences of his actions.
parenting, children, Maslow, motivation, homeschooling, train up a child
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Mar. 21, 2006 Keep That Which is Committed to Thy Trust
Webster's 1828 Dictionary of American English defines trust as:
Confidence; a reliance or resting of the mind on the integrity,
veracity, justice, friendship or other sound principle of another
person.
By virtue of our postion as parent, our children trust us. They trust us to to teach them what really matters in life, how to form and maintain relationships and what our God is like. This trust does not come by sound principle. Our children do not observe how often we follow through on our promises, how fair our discipline is and how we talk about fellow church members in the car on the way home to decide whether or not we are worthy of their trust.
I once worked with a young man who hated his mother. She was an alcoholic and spent much of her time passed out on the couch. He snuck into his neighbor's house in order to steal food to feed himself and his brothers. He was never short of angry words toward his mother and her alcohol abuse. He couldn't believe anything she said, yet he trusted her. She taught him basic principles about how the world works: that you cannot rely on other people, you take what you can get and you escape from your problems through alcohol. As much as he verbally despised her, he trusted her enough to blindly follow her example.
Whether we like it or not, we lead our children on the path of righteousness. We cannot set them before us and tell them to hurry on ahead. Our children trust us enough to follow us down the same path we choose. Carole Adams of the Foundation for American Christian Education describes trust as the second spiritual need of the child. She says children "...must develop trust in the character of the key adults in their lives." A character worthy of trust is key. If we have a character worthy of trust, one which is defined by "love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness and temperance," (Galatians 5:22-23) our children will learn to emulate these principles in their lives and esteem them in the lives of others.
Rather than earning their trust, we will be demonstrating the sound principles upon which our children's confidence can be laid. Our children have been committed into our trust and we have a great responsibility to lead accordingly.
trust, parenting, Christian, children, homeschooling, relationships
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Mar. 4, 2006 Cherishing our Children
According to Carole Adams of the Foundation for American Christian Education, in her article, The Christian Idea of the Child, the first spiritual need of the child is significance.
Significance: Children need to have a deep sense of safety, of feeling loved, cherished, and significant.
Christ gave great significance to the postion of the child. While He was teaching, several parents brought their children to Him, so that He might put His hands on them and bless them. The disciples rebuked them. Their teacher did not have time to deal with children, they thought. But Christ thought otherwise:
But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven.
--Matthew 19:4
The very kingdom of heaven is made up of believers with the humility and faith of a child. The word "children" is used over 1500 times in the bible, often in reference to the faithful. The Jews are the "children of Israel," and we are the "children of God."
In order to teach our children they are significant, we must learn to love them. Even the pagan loves his child, but not always as the Lord loves us. Oftentimes, we love our children as the world. We concern ourselves with their happiness, worldly opportunities and future success. We try to give them everything the world has to offer and shelter them from hardship and suffering. We teach them what is truly important to us through the choices we make for them from birth.
For the Christian, however, love begins with the love of the Lord and being in a right relationship with Him. Titus chapter two instructs older women to come alongside the younger women, teaching them diligently " to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children." (Titus 2:4)
Deuteronomy chapter 11 tells us to, " love the LORD your God, and to serve him with all your heart and with all your soul," (vs 13) and lists several promises for those who do this. We are told to "lay up these my words in [our] heart and in [our] soul" (vs 18) and teach them to our children (vs 19).
Seek first the Lord. Then lead your children to Him. This is significant. If we do not lead by example, we are not leaders. We are dictators. Leaders make decisions based on the best interests of those in their charge and they walk the path they have laid out for those who follow them. Consider the leadership of Moses and of Christ in these regards. The more I consider my walk with Christ and the more I consider the double standards I hold in regards to my children's behavior, the more I realize just how significant this concept of leadership is. I often am a dictator. That does not teach my children their worth and value as children in God's kingdom.
As we increasingly show Christ in us, our children will increasingly see their worth as children of God, created in His image (Genesis 1:26), conformed to the image of His Son (Romans 8:29) , prepared unto every good work (2Timothy 2:21) and prepared unto glory (Romans 9:23). What greater sense of love, safety and significance could we offer our children?
motivation, parenting, Christian, homeschooling, love
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Feb. 24, 2006 Interim Posting on Motivation
Sometimes I wish I had a PhD in something so I could just say stuff and people would listen to me. Or at least quote me.
Dr. Steven Reiss, for example, suggests that there really is no such thing as intrinsic motivation. This comes in response to the research coming out which suggests that extrinsic motivators, while improving performance in the short run, decrease intrinsic motivation leading to decreased performance in the future. He also questions the validity of making "value judgments" such as that one type of motivation is better than another.
So I guess we are completely environmentally controlled. The more I thought about this, the more it made sense to me. And the more sense it made, the more I got that queezy feeling of cognitive dissonance that causes me to think that much more. I have seen extrinsic motivation work. I have seen the behavior of troubled children transformed due to effective and consistent use of of such motivators. Boys' Town is a testament to this as is their Common Sense Parenting model which has been adopted by group home facilities and parent education facilities across the nation.
I guess I like to think backwards and turn things upside down, I don't know. But somehow I got from there to wondering if there really was such a thing as extrinsic motivation at all. Isn't it all intrinsic? In my last post on motivation, I decided (because it is my blog and I can quote myself as an authority on anything I want):
The infant is motivated by few desires: nourishment, comfort, mental stimulation and physical touch. As a child ages, his motivations become more complex, yet they still fall under these categories.
These are all internal desires strong enough to motivate a person to action. If I want a glass of milk, I will go get one. If I have to ask permission nicely to be granted this satiation of my thirst, I will do so. The existence of the milk and the offering of the milk did not motivate me...it was an internal desire that I was willing to exert some effort to meet.
Right now, I am thinking that the short-comings of extrinsic motivations is that we put far to much value on them. Schools are now offering cars to graduates based on academics and attendance. High-stakes testing is pushing educators to try to find more and more ways to motivate children, including merely paying them off for grades, as if it were their paycheck.
But I have not seen any of these programs turn out success stories like this:
At the Met School in Providence, Rhode Island, 70 percent of the students are black or Hispanic. More than 60 percent live below the poverty line. Nearly 40 percent come from families where English is a second language. As part of its special mission, the Met enrolls only students who have dropped out in the past or were in danger of dropping out. Yet, even with this student body, the Met now has the lowest dropout rate and the highest college placement rate of any high school in the state.
--Bill Gates at the National Education Summit on High Schools
And these kids don't get cars. They come in as "failures" of our public schools, are asked to work harder, prepare more and learn more than they ever have and they succeed. Why? It is not because of the extrinsic motivations. It is because teachers and staff take the time and energy to find out what each student's internal motivations are and match an educational program specific to him. Education for these students is not passing a test to get a good grade and a free pizza at Pizza Hut. It is meaningful, relevant and personal.
This reminds me of the verse, "Train up a child in the way he should go, and he will not depart from it." Each child is created with unique talents and abilities. We as parents have the difficult task of "learning to know" our children, discovering their God-given talents and interests and guiding them to see God's plan for their lives. But if we are truly seeking the path that he should go and not the path that we would have him go, I think we might find that the issue of motivation becomes secondary.
education, homeschooling, home school, parenting, motivation
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Feb. 19, 2006 Motivation and Self-Government
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It is in fact nothing short of a miracle that the modern methods of instruction have not yet entirely strangled the holy curious of inquiry. It is a very grave mistake to think that the enjoyment of seeing and searching can be promoted by means of coercion and a sense of duty.
---Albert Einstein
In my first entry on motivation, I shared some thoughts on the value of intrinsic motivation. One of the central components of the Biblical Principle Approach is the principle of Christian Self-Government. While this does apply to our civil government, its more immediate application is in our hearts. According to the Foundation for American Christian Education, "In order to have true liberty, man must be governed internally by the Spirit of God rather than by external forces. Government is first individual, then extends to the home, church, and the community. This principle of self-government is God ruling internally from the heart of the individual."
External motivations, forces or controls yield a child who is governed externally. Research in a variety of fields has noted that extrinsic rewards and punishments actually decrease motivation to perform certain tasks. Bonuses for job performance yield workers who do the minimum required unless some other reward is offered. Public criticism yields fear of trying anything but what has been done before for fear of failure.
The infant is motivated by few desires: nourishment, comfort, mental stimulation and physical touch. As a child ages, his motivations become more complex, yet they still fall under these categories. While it is true that we can use the physical discomfort of spanking or the mental stimulation of a new toy to control a child's behavior, we must be careful how we go about this.
In subsequent entries, I am going to explore the eight spiritual needs outlined in The Christian Idea of the Child by Carole G. Adams. Hopefully this will lead to a more coherent, Christian view of motivation as it applies to parenting and teaching.
- Significance: Children need to have a deep sense of safety, of feeling loved, cherished, and significant.
- Trust: They must develop trust in the character of the key adults in their lives.
- Acceptance: Children must acquire an adequate self-value, based upon their acceptance of their own individuality as a gift from God. Adult treatment of the child communicates unmistakably of his worth and potential.
- Purpose: If children see themselves as having a place in history and see the events in their lives in light of a providential God, then they can have assurance for their present and future.
- Work: They need activities that are real to them, significant, intriguing, not just amusing or entertaining nnobling work or occupationin order to acquire vision for the value of their life and purpose.
- Wisdom: Children need wise guidance from adults to help them make sense of their experiences and interpret their world through principles.
- Models of Christian self-government: Children need Christ-governed adult models who accept the authority that is theirs by virtue of their greater experience, knowledge, and wisdom, and who represent Gods government in their lives.
- Models of Christian character: Children need adult models who exemplify personal qualities of victorious Christian character, who are productive and committed, and who inspire them.
And let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works...
--Hebrews 10:36
For more information, on research behind motivation, you can check this article, Management Implications of the Interaction Between Intrinsic Motivation and Extrinsic Rewards, and this article, Hard Work and High Expectiations: Motivating Children to Learn.
motivation, education, homeschooling, home school, parenting
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I stumbled across an interesting entry over on Edwahoo's blog that brought up an issue worth consideration. Here I offer only further thought and reflection, no solutions.
The American Heritage Dictionary's definition of motivation is essentially worthless. Who can make anything out of this:
mo·ti·va·tion  (m  t -v  shn)n.1. a. The act or process of motivating. b. The state of being motivated. 2. Something that motivates; an inducement or incentive. I strongly dislike definitions which presuppose an understanding of the word you are looking up. Obviously, there is a root idea of motion. So my definition, which is as good as anything I could find, shall be: that which sets something in motion, or compels to action. I bring this up because motivation is such a tremendous issue in society today. Motivational speakers make big bucks speaking in business, schools, clubs and even homeschool groups. Many of the blogs I read mention motivation (or lack thereof) as a significant factor in their home education. Parents seem to be craving knowledge on how to motivate their children to do just about anything. In fact, a simple google search brings over 2 million websites (200,000 more than googling motivational speakers). I would be quick to argue that it is good for students to be motivated. But I also believe great care must be taken in our attempts to motivate them. All of us should act with a driving force, a sense of purpose, a set of values which compels us to action. But from whence do you derive your motivation? Intrinsic motivation comes from within. It is your heart, your conscious, your will acting to effect your environment. It is acting out of conviction and your personal judgment of the right course of action in a given situation. Often, however, our primary motivation is extrinsic, or external. We set rulers over ourselves. We choose our course of action based on what others will think or the rewards/punishments that we imagine will result. Ironically, we seem to serve as our own extrinsic motivator as we set up our own rewards to give ourselves when we do what we think we should be doing. Is this because we truly are what we eat? Are we merely a product of our environment? If we are successful in altering the external environment of an individual, will we be able to truly produce a better internal character in the individual? This is the main tenet of socialism...alter the environment and we can shape the individual. Or is it because we, too, are indoctrinated somewhat into this system? How can we go about appealing to the internal aspects of our children? How can we inspire them so that they form convictions which they will act on, despite the environmental influences going on around them. Our sermon on Sunday related a story that really affected me. A man was beaten nearly to death in Iraq. His aggressors demanded he renounce his faith. He refused and the beatings worsened until he was finally left for dead. Friends found him, and luckily he survived. After recovering, he praised God. Not for sparing him and aiding in his recovery, but for giving him the strength to not deny his Lord in the face of death. He was not able to confess Christ in this moment because of any perceived benefit or fear of punishment. He was motivated by a strong conviction that compelled him to speak the truth, despite the circumstances. education, homeschooling, home school, motivation, parenting
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