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Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Of Grace & Elegance and a Generation Passing
My grandmother, whom we called Grammy, passed away last week at the age of 90 years. Her health and mind has been slowly failing over the last few years. We were fairly certain we wouldn't have her through the summer. Now she is in the summer of Heaven with her Lord.
I have now, with my parents, buried all my grandparents in a short 15 month period. This has caused me to reflect on the cycles of life - children, parents, grandparents. My grandparents didn't give me the idea of loosing one - they all left en masse. Those dear old people that my parents discussed with their siblings on how to care for, no longer need caring for. It is a strange liberation for them and yet a strange new emptiness. Now their focus goes to the estates and their brothers and sisters who remain.
My view of life has changed. The old people were always my grandparents - not my children's! When I was in junior high, my great-grandfather died. I had such a good time with the cousins I didn't see often. We stayed up late, ran around everywhere, never saw parents until we needed to eat. As a result, I slept through my grandfather's funeral. This was a dear sweet man who lived so long on lemon drops and Freedent gum (that was what he told us kids). When I got home, I felt horrible! It didn't dawn on me until just this past week on what that man meant to my Dad. This was his grandfather, who loved him and helped raise him. I explained this to my daughter and niece, trying to impart the wisdom I just then realized. It took me over twenty years to realize that my parents had grandparents that they cared for and had to bury. How it hurt my Dad to have to bury this sweet man while his daughter slept. My Dad was blessed as his two grandma's lived for over a hundred years. WOW!!
Though Grammy was always this white haired lady to the girls, she wasn't that for me. In all truthfulness, she wasn't a cuddly grandma. When my sister and I were little, we called her "grandgemother." Whatever image comes to your mind upon the hearing of that word is probably a correct evaluation of her as a grandma. She was a harsh woman. Yet now I see why. She was a ranching wife, with a political husband. Not an easy job.
Prior to her marriage, she was the first XIT Queen. Beauty isn't word enough for her. She was elegant and graceful. Her red hair flowing. This I remember, rich red hair falling down like a sunset water-fall. Just as quickly as it fell, it was swooped up into her ranching bun. I did love her hair. As she got older and the hair turned whiter, she did soften tremendously. I really enjoyed her then.
Though she didn't play with us as grandchildren, she did adore her great-grandchildren. My daughter always caused great smiles on her. When my boys came around, she found endless delight into watching them play. She really didn't get to know my baby as her alzheimer's set in fully by then. She did see him and acknowledge him as her grandbaby.
Her passing marks the end of that generation, in my family anyway. My children no longer have great-grandparents to love on. Really, this is what they want - both of the children and the great-grandparents. Now my parents are retired and at the age where they can just enjoy the grandkids. It takes a bit out of them to keep them for a long time, but the so enjoy watching the boys play and the girls walk around whispering as teens tend to do.
I have to realize that it isn't just my parents getting older. Though I love hearing, "You're not old enough to have a teenage daughter!" The truth is that I do and I am. What a joy can be in getting older and watching the generations go! My grandmother's memories of the Dust Bowl and World War II are gone into the grave with her. But her stories are passed down and added to with each generation.
This one was told at her funeral: During the Great Depression, my Grammy and her mom only had one nice dress. Being that her mom was insistent that they attend church, they took turns. One would wear the dress one week, then the other would wear the same dress the next. This really impressed me as my Grammy always dressed well - even when ranching. In fact, I knew her mind was too far gone when I visited her in her room and she was wearing a pink and black sweat suit top with nice poly-blend sea green pants. Ohhh she would have had a fit had she known!!! I realized from the story that my Grammy's grace and elegance weren't just in her taste for clothes, it was the fabric of her being. She is grace and elegance! I would love those traits from her. Of the many traits of hers I have, I'm not sure those two fell to me ...
The kids and I visited Grammy after the baby was born. My parents came with me because at this time Grammy didn't always know who I was. Though she always recognized my daughter. My Dad took this picture for me. I am ok with my kids remembering Grammy like this; I have older memories and now stories to share. (Obviously, the person who dressed her this day was fired!)
I love you, Grammy! |
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Posted by Anonymous 
Thursday, June 19, 2008 - Untitled Comment
Thank you for sharing these memories. I'm so glad you can pass them on to your children. May your heart continue to be covered with soothing reflections.
Peace to you,
Renae
http://lifenurturingeducation.com