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Ecc. 3:1 To every thing there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven. I have a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach as I write this. We have had a hard and very emotional week here in our home. I have always believed that engagement it truly akin to marriage just without the cohabitation and the blessing of sex. At Christmas there is always the emphasis on how Mary was betrothed to Joseph, just a step aside to complete marriage. My husband and I have always felt that engagement is as sobering as the marriage in the seriousness of the commitment being made. Last Nov. our daughter Mandy and Ben became engaged. Rick and I both prayed for a deeper love for Ben as he was to be our son and we treated him as such. Yes, Ben had talked to Rick and asked permission and my husband was firm in what we expected from him and from them, have I mentioned recently how awesome my hubby is? We have spent the last 7 months nurturing this relationship with get-togethers and Sunday meals and doing things together more often. Ben lives an hour away so it wasn't like we saw him daily. It has been fun and all of the little girls had really taken to him and loved him like a brother. Ben is a good man. As an only child he adapted well to this loud and lively home of ours and I think he enjoyed the teasing and ruckus of being loved in our home. Last Tuesday Mandy came over with concerns about not being ready to get married. God was speaking to her about His will for her life. She had wise counsel and much prayer. She ended the engagement to Ben. She told me the next day and I cried. It really was bitter-sweet. To be a child of God means we follow His voice and His direction, God and the Gospel are allowed to interrupt our life at any time for the sake of God's glory and His purpose for our lives. I just was so surprised that this was the interruption. The sweet part is only that Mandy chose now rather than post-marriage. How many young adults go through a wedding because of money already spent, not wanting to cause shame on anyone, guilt?? Divorce in the church is rampant and nothing should be to small to be thought through well before marriage. I have cried so many tears the last few days and my eyes well as I write this. Rick and I have always felt that we want to love well the men and the young lady who come into our children's lives. We have known there could be pain in this and now we are feeling the brunt of it. I am glad that I feel this way, pain is certainly a measure of love. We miss Ben. I am so thankful to love and serve a faithful God. He will heal these two hearts, He will lead both to the place they are supposed to go. He is good, he is kind. Mandy is a good woman, Ben is a good man, for now God's purpose is changing the season of our home. We will trust Him. |
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