Hearts for Him | |
Baby Games
6:31 AM, Apr. 30, 2006
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Well, we already know that the baby is a girl and that she will be born on Tuesday, May 2nd. What we don't know is what she looks like, what she weighs, how long she will be, those kinds of things. So, does anyone want to make a guess? I'll give you some background information on the boys so you will have a starting point.
Anthony: born at 39 weeks, 5 days 9 lbs. 1 oz. 21 inches long lots of dark hair olive complexion (I gained 40 lbs. during pregnancy)
Jonathan: born at 38 weeks, 2 days 8 lbs. 11.9 oz. 21.5 inches long very little dark fuzz olive complexion (I gained 10 lbs. during pregnancy)
Abby: will be born at 38 weeks, 5 days ??? ??? ??? ??? (I gained 13 lbs. during pregnancy)
My guess: 8 lbs. 14.5 oz. 22 inches long dark curly hair fair complexion
What do you think? Post a comment and let me know! A Feeling of Accomplishment
6:13 AM, Apr. 30, 2006
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Yesterday, the boys and Mike stayed at Mike's parents' house all day long and I had a full day of cleaning to myself. I got so much done! I was really excited! I washed, dried, folded, hung, and put away around 10 loads of laundry. Including three loads of diapers. The other day when I was getting ready to do the diapers, I held up one of Jonathan's prefolds and one of Abby's to show my mom the size difference. It's huge! And so sweet. It seems amazing to me that my little girl will be here sooo soon! I got a lot of other miscellaneous housework done as well. All in baby prep. I have more to do today, but I think that by bedtime tonight, the apartment will be ready for Abby.
My to do list for today:
I am so very anxious to meet my little girl! And I am able to do that in just over two days now! TWO days!!! Doubts be gone
3:23 AM, Apr. 26, 2006
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I am feeling incredibly grateful this morning for my wonderful husband. Sure, there are issues and schtuff, but he's really improved in so many areas and God made that apparent to me again this morning. I don't know how exactly, but He showed me that I really have a lot to be thankful for.
Satan started in with the doubts again earlier, but it was SOOO short-lived. It didn't take long at all for that to do a complete turnaround!
Tonight I'm thinking a lot about Psalm 118:8. "It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man."
This was part of our Sunday School lesson last week and I just find it so important. It is centered around something that we deal with on a continuous basis. How often do we put trust into ourselves, our spouses, our children, our parents, our friends, our church family, whoever...before we trust God. When we are feeling afflicted, who is it that we run to first? Or do we even begin by turning to someone - God or anyone else? I know sometimes I initially lash out in anger. Based on my feelings of being let-down by a person. And why did I feel let-down a person? Because I put trust in them before the Lord. We are going to fail each other. Plain and simple. God will not fail us - He will not forsake those who chose to seek Him. He will not forget us. He may not answer our prayers in OUR time or in the way that WE want, but He has not and never will forget those of us who seek Him. It's not about us, and we seem to forget that. Our agendas mean nothing - it's God's agenda that counts. And we don't know what is on His agenda. So, we need not worry, stress, or despair. God has our best interest at heart and He will be there for us. Even when we fail Him.
I think the last few lines sums up why my doubts and fears from Satan earlier were so short-lived. It's knowing God's word, believing it, and then using it. We may not intentionally use it - but if it's there in our hearts and our heads, we are able to fend off attacks without even realizing it, or realizing why it was.
I forgot that I was going to include this thing I received in an email from my college advisor.
Question: What is the shortest chapter in the Bible? Answer: Psalm 117
Question: What is the longest chapter in the Bible? Answer: Psalm 119
Question: What chapter is in the center of the Bible? Answer: Psalm 118
Fact: There are 594 chapters BEFORE Psalm 118. Fact: There are 594 chapters AFTER Psalm 118. Add these numbers up and you get 1188.
Question: What is the center verse in the Bible?0 Answer: Psalm 118:8
Question: Does this verse say something significant about God's perfect will for our lives?
The next time someone says they would like to find God's perfect will for their lives and that they want to be in the center of His will, just send them to the center of His Word!
Psalm 118:8 "It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man." Now isn't that odd how this worked out or was God in the center of it? New Concern
11:03 AM, Apr. 24, 2006
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Mike's boss just called and he is now scheduled to work three days a week instead of the four that we had been anticipating - which really throws a wrench into our budget. We need him to have at least four shifts to just barely make it, but if he has only three shifts, we won't. That is very scary. He needs to find a new job or keep the job and transfer to a different store or SOMETHING. I am sure that God has something better in store for Mike - though at the moment I cannot imagine what that would be. I pray that God gives Mike the confidence to look for new employment and to secure it soon. (I know - I know - I'm wanting it on my timeline, not God's timeline, and that's wrong, but I *do* want it to be soon) I pray that the Lord would give me patience as well in regards to our finances. I honestly think it's time to downsize our rent payment by moving to a new apartment that is much cheaper, but I don't know that we will be able to afford to do that anytime soon either. This could be the answer to prayer about Mike getting the forty hours per week. But I think he is planning on talking to Eric again and asking him if he is really considering the third shift weekends. If he is and if Britany is willing to let the switch happen, it would really really be good. But I kinda feel like God is trying to show us that it's time for Mike to move on from his current job. In the meantime, I'm feeling called to go back to work part-time, doing something somewhere that I can have at least Abby with me (she'll be here in one week and one day!!!) and that I can possibly have the boys with me as well. We sincerely need prayer for God's guidance as to the direction he wants to take our lives. Kids In Church
8:30 AM, Apr. 24, 2006
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At church yesterday morning, a couple of
things became really apparent to me. First of all, at the church
the boys and I had been previously attending, the children and the
adults (throughout the age spectrum) were separated. I have been
hearing and thinking about the family worship practice and idea and the
church we have been attending for a couple of weeks now allows for that
a whole lot more than our previous one did.I decided that we would be attending Sunday School at 9:30 - me in a room with other women, Anthony in a room with four and five year old children and Jonathan in a room that is up to three years. Probably something like one or two up to three years old. Then, they also offer Children's Church, but the kids are in the sanctuary during the worship time (singing) and then they are dismissed to go into Children's Church. Children's Church is for kids ages 3-6 years old. When they turn 6, they stay in the sanctuary. I really like this concept. I found a spot in the sanctuary that is close to the door that the kids use to leave for Children's Church and I think what my plan is for next week is to get to church, drop the boys off in their Sunday School rooms, and then go to my Sunday School class. After my class gets out, I will get Anthony from his room and we will sit in the sanctuary together during the worship service and then he can decide whether to stay in there with me or go on to Children's Church. I'm really okay with either option. And, then in two weeks, I'll have both Anthony and Abby in the sanctuary with me. I think that will work out fine. I don't think that Jonathan is ready for sanctuary time yet, and I know that he won't be until he learns to sit quietly, etc. But I want to just work with Anthony at this point in time. I'm hoping to get him to a place where obedience comes a little more quickly and happily. Jonathan will be joining us in the sanctuary in October anyhow, so I think that given the fact that its just for a short season, it will be the best way to work it out. When I have all three with me in there, I plan on Jonathan being in between Anthony and I. I could have one child on each side of me and Abby in front of me, but I don't want to do that, I don't think. It'll be much easier once Mike is able to attend church with us. He is currently working a really odd shift that is hard on our family, but do-able. He works Wednesday and Thursday second shift and then Friday and Saturday third shift. With this work schedule, he is not able to attend church with us, which we would very much like to have happen. I was joking around with one of his co-workers about possibly working Mike's thirds and then Mike would work his second shifts. (The co-worker is currently in the quitting process, but said he'd like to work third shift there, and by working overnights on the weekends, he'd still be able to manage it with a new job he's starting next month) Anyhow, if the co-worker agrees to the switch and the manager does as well, it would mean that Mike would have 40 hours per week instead of 32, and that he would only work 1 shift time instead of 2. (He'd work Wednesday through Sunday, second shift) That would be really nice - if he HAS to stay at the job he's currently in (I'm not a big fan of the job - or actually of a few employees in particular, and granted, that will likely happen no matter where he works, but there's a few there that REALLY get to me.) Anyhow, those are my thoughts about the kids and church practices, etc. Introspective and reflective
4:07 AM, Apr. 18, 2006
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My marriage is under attack again.
It's been under attack for the last few years, this past year being the
greatest period of time and damage done. Usually, it is under
attack via my husband. Not that HE is attacking it, but that
Satan is using my husband as the vessel for destruction. Right
now though, I feel as if he is using me for that same destruction.Let me explain. About a year ago (sometime in June), my husband began a friendship with a co-worker that eventually developed into an affair. The affair happened last September, and my husband finally confessed about it on the first of October. We went through an extremely rocky time immediately following that - with me struggling to keep the marriage together and him dealing with guilt issues and wanting to be alone and miserable, etc. Since that time, he has gone back to her (emotionally and verbally, but not physically) every now and then. He was also continuing to access pornography on a fairly regular basis. It was eating him alive - the two things were. Finally, about three weeks ago, it stopped - fully stopped. The other woman, the pornography, everything - it just stopped. Of which I am incredibly grateful. But now for some odd reason ( could be pregnancy hormones, emotional overload, whatever ) I am so unhappy. There is a lot to do before the baby is born in two weeks ( I have to be at the hospital checking into labor and delivery in two weeks, one hour, and fifteen minutes! ) But there is so much stuff to be done and my husband, who is finally getting his life in the right place, is feeling stressed and overloaded with the amount of care the boys require and the housework that needs to be done and the fact that I am in almost constant pain from contractions/cramping and a locked hip. I'm seeing a chiropractor about it, but it is only making it bearable at the moment, not making it "better" as I am two weeks from delivery and there's somewhat of a limitation as to what can be done right now. It's really hard on me, because I see all that needs to be done, and I know that if I could just do it, it'd get done and all would be well. But I have to rely on my husband to do it and it is just so hard, because I know that he could do a quicker, better, whatever - job than what he is doing. Instead of feeling grateful for his help, I'm feeling edgy and quite crabby. I'm also feeling like a cad for some odd reason because I made him stay in our marriage and I know he's not happy with the way things are right now. (Totally understandable that he'd feel that way - he has to work outside our home, take care of our boys and me, AND work on getting the house into shape for our daughter to come home in a little over two weeks) But I just feel so terrible about him not being happy. I want to make him happy, and I have this idea in my head that it is ME personally that he is not happy with - not the situation, but ME. I think to myself, "if I hadn't made him give up Amy, he'd be happy. If I hadn't forced him to stay in our marriage, he'd be happy. If I just would have / wouldn't have done this / that, he'd be happy now." It's an incredibly unhealthy way to think and I know that I did the right thing by putting the pressure on him to give up Amy and to work on our marriage, but those are the two things that come the most quickly to mind when I think of him being unhappy. I want for him to be happy. Truly happy. I know that Satan is using these doubts to further depress me and to create a ridge in my marriage, since the control he had over Mike isn't working anymore and I am now his target. I hate this! It is so hard. Please pray for me / us that these next two weeks will be as smooth as possible, that Satan will not be allowed a further grip on our marriage by either one of us, and that the grip he has on it now will slip into nothingness. Pray for my husband's strength and willpower and patience as I know this is a trying time for him - particularly with all that needs to be accomplished and what he has to put up with ( that being me 
) here at home. Pray for me that I am able to have some relief
from physical pain, from emotional pain, that Satan's grip be loosened
and relieved of, and that I am able to be of more support to Mike than
I have been. And also to have ( and show ) a grateful heart to my
husband for all that he has done / is doing for me / us / our
family. I really am grateful - it's just sometimes hard to show
how grateful you are when you are caught up in self-pity and resentment.Thursday, March 30, 2006
3:24 AM, Mar. 30, 2006
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Heart Strings The thing on my mind this morning is heart strings. I was reading an entry in someone else's blog and I came across the topic of tying heart strings. I guess I'm not sure exactly what this means but I am curious to know, so if anyone can explain it, I'd really appreciate it! Discipline I thoroughly want to teach my children self-discipline. I believe that to teach self-discipline, you must first teach discipline. Correct me if I am wrong. What I am currently wondering is the best way to teach discipline. I believe that for right now with my children, the main focus of discipline is to obey on the first request and to do so with a good attitude. I think we need to sit down and come up with a few major house rules and start implementing them though. I mean, we have rules, but they can be somewhat flexible, and I don't think that flexible rules are good for character training, or for teaching discipline. I will probably work on our house rules (with my husband, of course) later today and post them here tomorrow morning. Bible Passage of the Day: "Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let you gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition; with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. "Finally brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me - put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you." Philippians 4:4 - 4:9 |
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