When I was in high school, I decided to become a teacher.  Specifically grammar and literature.  I loved what we now call "Language Arts".  In school, it was all 'English'.  I was going to teach students to 'see' grammar for the simple 'mathmatics of words' that it is.  Gerunds and participles are simply grammatical terms like quotients and decimals.

I became a mother instead.  I am not sorry that I did.  However with motherhood came this delightful experience I like to call homeschooling.  FINALLY.  I'm a TEACHER!  WAHOO!

Sigh.  Guess what.  I learned that I didn't like teaching.  I don't delight in imparting knowledge to students who don't understand a concept.  I do enjoy planning, choosing, researching, and every other part of the process.

I've spent 14 years homeschooling because I know it is what I am supposed to do.  It would violate my conscience to put my children in a public or Christian school.  Trust me, I've tried to do it several times.  I cannot.  However, I've also disliked the job for those 14 years.

I'm determined to change that.  If I'd spent the time and money it takes to become a teacher, I would have also discovered, too late, that I didn't enjoy teaching.  But, in that instance, I would have also taught myself to like it.  I would have found ways to enjoy the process of teaching and looked for ways to make how I spent each day interesting.  I wouldn't have given up and given into my lack of excitement.  Why?  Because I would be being paid to do something and it's a disservice to my employer not to do it with a good attitude inside as well as outside.

Guess what.  It took me fourteen years to realize that my children deserved the same kind of attitude adjustment.  No, I don't groan and moan.  No, I don't whine and complain.  But they know I do it because I love them and think it's best.  How much better would it be if they knew I'd taught myself to enjoy it!  What a lesson.

I'm determined but it may mean much more work for me... and that isn't something I'm all that thrilled aobut.  Sigh.

First budgeting, now this.  At this rate, I may be trying to learn to like pain next!