Forgiving an offender

Here's a subject that has been hard for me for a long time.  We have a family member that has offended most of my family and forgiveness on my part has been a huge struggle.  This person refuses to hear anyone who comes to him on this issue, making it double hard for me!  But this morning, I was watching Joyce Meyer.  I wasn't ever a fan of heres till recently I started listening to her and she really has some awesome points.  I struggle with women in the ministry, but I also know that we can still learn from them, even if we don't agree with everything they do.  This morning she was talking about Forgiving an offender.  Someone offends you and you just really want to retaliate.  But that's not what God has in mind for us.  We ask God to forgive us, as we forgive those who trespass against us.  Joyce had a guy on the show that was talking about how a church leader had offended his wife over and over and how he struggled with forgiving this man.  God told him that He wanted him to Repent.....What?  Wait!  He didn't do anything, he's not the offender here...but yeah, God wanted him to repent.  He repented for his thoughts and actions, then God wanted him to forgive.  Forgiving not only saying I forgive you, it's also doing as God does and FORGETTING about it.  Now that's a tough one!  But God does bring healing when he sees the sincere heart of the repentant person.  He helps us to forget those things, when we are sincere about forgiving and forgetting.  Not saying that it won't ever cross the mind again, but it doesn't bring the bitter sting it once did.  Then I think the third thing he said was loving and giving to the person who's offended you.  Give them gifts, show them love.  Joyce mentioned that this also happened to her and when she obeyed and did these things, a year later, the offender came to her and asked her for forgiveness.  How awesome is God, if we'll just step back and allow him to work on the offenders heart instead of trying to fix it ourselves!  Trusting in Him to work in our lives and others is what He wants us to do.  He is in control, why do we feel like we have to take the wheel? 

 
Father in Heaven, help us to yield and to step back and allow You to do Your work in our lives and the lives of those who hurt us.  Give us peace, help us to forgive and forget.  Teach us to Love unconditionally.  Purify our hearts and cleanse us of any evil thoughts.  Transform our lives that You may shine through us!  Thank You for your amazing unconditional Love for us!  And for your perfect sacrifice for us!       In Jesus Precious name, Amen.