Tuesday, October 31, 2006 - Becoming a mother
Nine years ago yesterday I became a mother.
I was 19 years old and having just become estranged from my own mother in the months before, I was scared and totally unprepared for what this new role would do to my life.
I arrived at the hospital at 2 am on Tuesday after having contractions every 10 minutes for about 6 hours or so. The hospital was 70+ miles away, so we didn't feel safe waiting any longer than that. After an exam (in which the nurse had to make me remove my underwear...don't ask...I was silly and very naive) and an hour of walking and another exam I was sent home to wait it out. A sweet nurse caught us in the hallway and recommended that we just head for a local park and walk rather than going all the way home, knowing how far we had to travel.
I wished later than we had listened to her, but we headed for home. We stopped at my inlaws hoping we could get some sleep. We had left out as soon as my husband had come home from work, he hadn't had any sleep and he was afraid he couldn't safely drive the last ten miles to our apartment. Precious MIL met us on the porch with, "What are you doing here, I thought she said she was in labor?".
Dh shrugged his shoulders and I was left to answer that I was in labor but it was still early. Dh asked if we could take a nap there and she responded that he could, but she didn't want my water breaking in her bed. I started tearing up and thankfully dh decided that we could make it home. At some point I passed the plug which was like a greenish blob of thick jello, yuck- I know!
At home, dh slept most of the day and I continued to contract sporadically throughout the day. I knew that I should probably get some sleep, but the contractions were just close enough and just strong enough that paired with my excitement, sleep was an impossibility.
The next afternoon we made the trip again and were again sent home, though there had been some changes. On the way home we came across an old lady with a flat tire who was being helped by an even older man. Anyone that knows George knows that he couldn't help but stop and play hero. Any other time I love that quality in him...but this just wasn't the time! 20 minutes and 3 contraction later we were on our way again. At this point I was finally ready to sleep, but dh had other plans. We have to make the rounds visiting various friends.
When we do finally get home we are surprised by some of our friends bearing baby gifts...A beautiful handmade Precious Moments quilt from Mrs. Anonymous and her sister and the cutest little outfits from another friend. It was almost like an impromptu baby shower, which could have been really fun, but by then this whole labor thing was joining hands with sheer exhaustion and I was getting pretty whiny.
DH has the terrific idea to go back to his parents so that we would be that much closer to the hospital...an idea that I was less than thrilled about after our last visit. My friend Christy rescued me and took me to the local football field/walking track to see if we could get this bally rolling. Within 2 laps around the track my contractions are every 3 minutes and I want to die.
We rush back to the inlaws and off to the hospital. Christy heads home to change clothes and then she is right behind us. It is now about 8pm, totally dark, and Christy has not a clue as to where the hospital is.
We get to the hospital at about 9:15. Not only was I not buckled up, but at some points I am all but standing up and screaming at George to hurry. He drops me off in the ER parking lot where we get into a fight about him not walking me in (he had to park elsewhere). I get inside and the staff is laughing at us. I get to the desk and the lady says, "I'm guessing you are in labor?".
I said, "Is it that obvious?", as I was trying to act really cool.
She responds with a grin, "Well, I saw you in the parking lot."
Mortified, I wait for dh to walk me to Labor & Delivery. When he finally comes in I chew him out in the privacy of the elevator.
We get checked in and I get checked out. I think I was dilated to about a 6, which was pretty disheartening after so many contraction. At least they weren't sending us home this time...
Eventually Christy arrives with a wild adventure story. She not only got lost but at one point she was pulled over in a very dark spooky area in the middle of nowhere and the "officer" that pulled her over hit her car pulling in behind her and then took off. Somehow I don't think it was really a police officer, as there was reports of weirdos impersonating officers in the weeks before. Who knows really.
She also told us the funny story of having such a full bladder that she grabbed herself and did a pee-pee dance like a little kid in the "privacy" of that same elevator that we had argued in...then she looked up and noticed the sign about the security camera in the elevator. Those guards must have peed on themselves laughing at us all that night!
Her bladder relieved, Christy (the only person I knew my age that had already been through this) proceeded to try breathing with me, kinda Lamaze style I guess.
Later we would learn how entertaining this proved to the L&D staff.
I'm telling you, all these births later, that this was the craziest hospital I have ever been to! Here I am, a scared first timer with no real experienced support, and I have no labor nurse to check on me, support me, and help me through this.
You'd think it was the fifties, but this was only nine years ago!
About 1am I am wheeled to a delivery room that looked much like an operating room and told to push. Not knowing the first thing about how to push, I kick the 2 nice nurses holding my feet across the room.
I wish I were joking! I seriously had no idea what to do. I didn't help that at this point I had a good dose of nubain in me that had me hallucinating.
The nice lady explains to me how to push and I try again.
Suddenly there is panic in the room!
They shove an oxygen mask over my face and tilt my bed till my head is nearly on the floor. Everyone is whispering and no one will tell me anything. Later I would learn that the baby's heart had dropped into the 60's and my dh and friend were told not to tell me.
I don't remember how long I was in that position, but soon I was flat on my back trying to push again. I was so tired and discouraged that the pushing didn't go very well. It didn't help that my "support" chickens....er...people took turns leaving the room to throw up at the sight of it all. Bless their hearts!
About 3:30am I am ready to give up. The staff gathers in a corner and decides that if I'm not pushing effectively in 5 minutes that they will have to break the baby's collarbone and push him back for a c-section...of course I'm not told any of this until after the fact.
I push again and the doctor frowns. The sweet midwifery student who would be catching my baby asked me if I would reach down and feel the baby's head and all of his beautiful hair.
That was all it took. I will never forget the feeling of his wet little head or the rush that went through me in that moment.
Who needed sleep at a time like this!!
At 3:53am (50 hours from that first trip to the hospital) Wesley James slipped into this world, all 10lbs, 2oz of him. He had fuzzy red hair and the chubbiest cheeks you could imagine!
I never imagined then what a blessing he would be or how much I would love being his mommy. His cheeks aren't nearly as chubby as they were nine years ago, nor his red hair as fuzzy, but he is still my baby...it's just a bit harder to convince him of that now.
Happy birthday bubby!
Comments
Tuesday, October 31, 2006 - Untitled Comment
Posted by anyachristine
You are quite the storyteller! I felt like I was right there with ya! Sounds like it was a wild evening/morning. I'm sure we all have some stories to tell about our children's births, but I did enjoy reading yours :)
Happy Birthday to your boy! 10 lbs? wow, you are a real woman!
Christy :)
Wednesday, November 1, 2006 - Awww...
Posted by LittleEblingsAcademy
What a sweet story!
Thanks for sharing!
In Him, Beckie
Wednesday, November 1, 2006 - :)
Posted by Sweetie
You are an engaging story teller! What an adventure you had! Happy birthday to your son, and Happy Birthing day to you!
Saturday, November 4, 2006 - :-)
Posted by weareqf
Isn't if fun to have all those stories that "someday you will laugh about"? I must admit that you had me rolling!! Tell your son I said Happy (belated) Birthday!! Thanks for sharing!! I just LOVE birth stories!! Love ya! Kris
